Reading the Bible and praying more is right at the top of Christian womens’ goals and resolutions lists, up there with getting organized and losing weight.  Unfortunately, just like organizing and weight loss aspirations, our best plans and intentions to have daily devotions or quiet times tend to fizzle a few weeks into the year.  What happens?  We’re convinced of the value of spending time getting to know our God through His word.  We’re convinced of the power of prayer in our lives and others’.  How does something this important and desirable keep slipping through the cracks in our days?

One of the ways we unintentionally keep something from happening is making it too difficult or complicated.  Do you admire a friend who is able to read her Bible an hour or two a day?  Or a friend who studies Greek daily?  A favorite author who writes about watching the sun rise as she prays over her day?  All of these things may be good, but do they work for you at this point of your life?  Maybe you have three small children running around and 1 – 2 hours of uninterrupted reading time just isn’t going to happen.  Maybe you are anything but a morning person.  In your mind is anything less than your “ideal” quiet time not worth doing?  In other words, are you making it more difficult than it needs to be?

All you really need to have your quiet time are three things:  A time, a place, and your “stuff” - your Bible and anything else you’re planning to read.  Place and “stuff” are pretty straightforward.  You need a place to sit and read and something to read of course.  Where we usually get messed up is time.  We usually know “what” we want to do, it’s the “when” we have a problem with, as in the “when” just not happening!

Here is a common scenario.  We hear that waking up early to have our quiet time is the best way to go so that’s what we shoot for.  If you’re an “early riser” this can work great, but for the rest of us…  Tell me if this sounds familiar:  You wake up later than you planned (again) and you resolve to get on track and have your quiet time later that morning.  Then “something” happens and you have to put it off until lunch.  Lunchtime ends up being taken up with “something” else and you figure maybe in the afternoon you’ll catch a little time.  Guess what… “something” keeps happening until you’re laying in bed wondering what happened to your quiet time.

So if you don’t get up early in the morning is all lost?  Not at all!  Look at your day and pick the best time that works for you.  Don’t worry about your friend, your favorite author’s schedule, or what you’ve heard is “most spiritual.”  What time of your day tends to be the least hectic and most likely to be somewhat quiet?  The kids’ nap time?   While dinner is in the oven?  My best time is right before bedtime!  It’s quiet, there’s nowhere I have to be, and everyone else is in bed too.  Be creative!  What’s important isn’t the time of day you pick, it’s that you pick a time that works best for your current schedule and that you guard it from invading “somethings”.  The “best” time for your quiet time is the time you can realistically make it happen!  You might have to experiment a bit to find the best time.  Also, have your place picked out and your “stuff” where it needs to be so looking for your Bible and a pen doesn’t end up being a “something” that comes up!

So how long should your quiet time be?  Again, look at what works for you.  I’d love to have two hours a day but in this season of my life when I have four kids, one with special needs, two hours isn’t going to happen on a typical day.  God knows your circumstances and responsibilities – He created your family!  Do what you realistically can.  You can probably get 20 – 30 minutes into your day.  Some days you’ll have more time, some days you’ll have less.  If you can’t find even 20 – 30 minutes, take a look at some other activities you find time for like checking e-mail, web surfing, Facebook, telephone calls, reading…  We make time for these things without thinking twice about it.  Not trying to be legalistic… just something to think about!

It’s not too late to get your prayer and Bible reading resolutions and goals back on track.  Sit down and take a few moments to think about what the best time is for you and make a plan of attack!

Don’t you just LOVE Jennifer? I ADORE HER!

She is one of our speakers at our upcoming (in just a FEW WEEKS) Ultimate Women’s Expo! Don’t miss her! You will be fired, inspired, encouraged, and equipped to make THIS YEAR count! Learn more about our event here: A YEAR THAT COUNTS.

Are you a “night owl” who needs more help making a consistent quiet times happen?  Jennifer Schwilling’s new e-book Night Owl Devotions is all about thinking outside the box to make meaningful devotions a part of a busy mom’s life.  You can visit her on-line at:  http://www.MomsNoChaosZone.com or http://www.DaisyChainDailyCarnival.com

Sweet friends, “Me-Time” ain’t a myth! It must be a discipline. It can make or break you.

I was just peeking in at Facebook–I know, I know! I am SUPPOSED to be writing! Well, NOW I am! ha!

I ran across a link to an article that is STILL circulating on the web about the “Me-Time Myth” for moms.

Nice rhetoric. But, interestingly written by a YOUNG mom. I have written many, many things as a young mother. I have NO problem with youth. Just a problem with short-sighted youth. I just wonder what she will think about her ideas as she grows older? I wonder if her children will embrace her teaching on this one–or resent her for this commitment? I wonder how many young mothers will be led astray into the pit of depression or despair because they have embraced this teaching?

This week, my son got married. Of course, this year, I have moved into the “empty nest” years. There is something about this season of motherhood that is strangely more retrospective than ever before. I have evaluated my decisions through the years even more than ever. I think that is why I am SO alarmed by this article. It goes against everything that God has taught me through some very hard, hard times. It goes against everything that I have learned to regret through the years of motherhood.

Want to know what I think looking back?

It is “essential” for young mothers to take time to take good care of themselves. Fail in this area and regardless of your great work, you will fail in all other areas.

Mothers have to be ALL THERE ALL OF THE TIME. No mother can fully be what God has called her to be if she does not take good care of herself all along the journey. She will crash under the load. Everyone will suffer.

Recently, I was at the gym talking with some of the older ladies that were there. (Actually, it is interesting and quite bothersome how few ladies my age or younger are at the gym–perhaps because of those who “slam” the idea of taking care of yourself as being “selfish” or “ungodly” or “worldly” perhaps??? I know that I have heard it A LOT through the years.)

These Titus 2 woman are different from many of the ladies that I see in our culture. They radiate God. They have a peace that I have not seen in a long, long time. They are truly alluring. They are a glory to God. They draw me into biblical womanhood.

When I go to work out, they are usually there cheering me on, noticing my hard, hard work, and sharing wisdom that I need more than ever. They are truly worth far more than rubies!

The other day, they stopped me and commended me for being there, taking good care of myself. I got teary, remembering how much I have changed through the years. Actually, I see things much, much different now than just a year ago. I remember thinking that I just did not have time for ME. I remember thinking that it was just selfish to take so much time to workout. Oh, I was constantly turned inside-out over whether or whether not it was selfish to want to finish my daily quiet time or have a bubble bath ALL TO MYSELF! Now, get an idea of why I teared up?

They began talking about their concerns for the younger women who put themselves on the back-burner and end up very burned out in the midst of the heavy demands of mothering. These precious ladies were talking about how much they wish they had only known how to balance taking care of themselves better while they were on the front lines as young moms. That is my wish for all of you. Where were they when I was young? Oh! To have more godly OLDER woman rise up and teach us how to be godly women!

We need to hear this wisdom more now than ever. Talk to the older women (Titus 2).  Learn from them. Really listen to their regrets. They are key to your life today. They are key to your life many years to come.

Your calling as a godly woman is not a little thing. You have to be ALL THERE. That means that you MUST take good care of yourself–spirit, soul, and body. It is not a selfish thing. It is not as worldly thing. It is an essential. It is a command (see Deuteronomy 6). It is modeled and commanded all throughout Scripture. Even Jesus modeled it in His very busy, hectic, and demanding life.

It is NOT good enough to take care of your spirituality ONLY. God created us in His image–spirit, soul, and body. Yes, He has paid the price for our freedom spiritually, but that is not where He left it. He also paid the price for our freedom mentally, emotionally, and physically. It is not just an extra to take care of ourselves. It is an essential if we are being a good steward of what God has entrusted us to.

I KNOW it is hard. I know that it is a battle to even make time for “Me-Time” in the midst of the heavy demands of managing the godly home. I know that you can feel that it is never quite enough. That is not because it is WRONG, but rather it is because this must be a daily discipline–we all need a daily quiet time (nothing is more important to train your children in than to respect your daily quiet time)…daily time to exercise and take care of yourself physically…daily time to pow-wow with your spouse…a regular investment in relationships with other godly women…on and on! Yes. DAILY.

It must be a priority each and every day before you begin anything else. You MUST have your “daily manna” to feed your spirit, soul, and body. Don’t you think it is interesting that God told His people in Scripture that they were to gather enough manna FIRST for themselves, then for their households, and then for those who came into their tent. Strange  how easy we get this all backwards–give to the world (maybe even our churches), then give leftovers to our families and usually leave ourselves anorexic and starving to death in the background. And, manna is not just about “spiritual things.” It was LITERAL FOOD that God provided. A daily food.

I think this teaching on the woes of “Me-Time” just  “punches my buttons” because I failed in this area of my life when the kids were very young. I denied myself to the point that I did crash. I sacrificed for everyone else, thinking that it was the “godly thing” to do. It took the ramifications from this lifestyle to get my attention: depression and sickness.

I bought the “lie” that it was “godly” and “dying to myself” to take care of everyone else but ME. I did not believe that “ME-TIME” was important until I was in the pit. My biggest lesson from the pit was that if I do not set aside time for MOM, there is a very weak mom up against a “strongman” and that is not God’s best. That is not God’s will. Our Heavenly Father has called us to be “Virtuous” women. That means that we will be “armed and ready for battle.” No one is armed and ready for the battle when they push their limits and refuse to invest anything into themselves. A good soldier must be fully prepared and strong at all times– Army strong: spirit, soul, and body.

I can certainly understand the reasoning behind the “Me-Time Myth.” However, the secret is not in becoming a mommy martyr, denying the needs that we all have and must be honest about. The secret is learning how to balance the huge demands that we face as a godly women–learning what to let go of anything that hinders us from running the race and pressing toward the mark (Those extra activities for the kids, perhaps? Running on empty? Doing “the stuff” instead of the most important things?) and learning how to really soak in and enjoy the precious gifts we have–whether that time is ALONE or surrounded by all of our treasures.

It IS tough! But, it is essential if we are going to become the godly women that God created us to be.

So, sweet friends, I come to you as an older woman (eek!). I challenge you to look beyond the rhetoric and learn from God and the teachers He is sending into your lives–Titus 2 teachers. Be balanced. Let the stuff go that keeps you from being able to “BIBLICALLY” take good care of yourself. Don’t fall for either lie–the selfish lie that it is all about you OR the “Pharisee’s” lie that you are called to be a mommy martyr during this season. Really think about what your children are learning at this time–do you want for THEM to live like YOU? I want for my children to live an abundant life and have ALL Christ died to give them. That begins with loving themselves–otherwise they can never love others…or God. I am their greatest teacher. I pray that I teach this lesson well!

A different perspective…

Love ya!
Cindy

“She sets about her work vigorously; her arms are strong for her tasks…” Proverbs 31: 17

PS…Any comments older women (or younger women–looking on our lives?)????

When your schedule runs long or you have a pressing project at work, the first thing that enters your mind is that you can come in early or stay late to get it done. The problem with that idea is that the rest of your routine will suffer. There will be less, if any, time for your family. From the point that you steal time from one area to benefit another, you will be playing catch up.

Over time, your body will respond to the added demands. It won’t be pretty. Stress of any kind that is prolonged can cause health problems. You are more likely to develop illnesses because of a depressed immune system. You won’t be your kind and cheery self anymore as you become short tempered and bite everyone’s head off.

What about your goals? Whether work-related or personal, your goals never seem to get met. The laws of nature are a funny thing. In our society, we have the idea that to get more done you have to speed up and sacrifice. While that may be true in some situations, the part that we choose to sacrifice makes a big difference.

To get ahead and get more done you need to slow down. Sleep is a part of your daily routine. It’s a part that we don’t pay much attention to. After all, if you are tired, you will eventually fall asleep, right? That’s not how sleep is supposed to work.

The human body is like a beautiful machine. All machines need maintenance to continue working. The body does its repair jobs while you sleep. There are several sleep cycles. During the deepest sleep, the body can go about restoration and repair because you are not keeping it occupied with movement and thought. It’s sort of like a short hibernation period.

Unfortunately, many people don’t get enough restorative sleep for it to matter. You wake up tired and that leads to concentration problems. It’s hard to think of new ways to increase your productivity when you can’t keep your eyes open. Burning the candle at both ends will leave you with nothing.

Do yourself a favor. Get your 7-8 hours of sleep a night. As a result you will wake up refreshed and your focus will be clear. You’ll find you have more energy and get more accomplished in all areas of your life. There is less downtime needed during the day because you got all of the rest you needed when you slept.

Tired? Weary? Confused? Have NO idea which way to go?

STOP!

Stop, beloved. Pull back. Don’t do a thing. Don’t talk. Don’t change things around. Don’t make any decisions-yet. Simply STOP.

There are times that our enemy finds a weapon that takes us by surprise. The time will come. What do you do? You learn from Jesus. You study Him. You learn from Him. You learn to walk out His ways. They ALWAYS work.

It does not make any difference what weapon the enemy uses, the same tactics work against him. You don’t even have to read a big manual to get a huge plan. You just have to read THE MANUAL. Oh, let me help you find the most powerful tactic, the one that all of the others hinge upon. Turn to James 4:7…

“Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.” KJV

Resist the devil. What does that mean?

Well, if you will begin to search for ways resist him, you are in for a treat. There are many ways: get in the Word, get the Word into you, speak the Word, pray, fast, plug in with other believers to take the giants, step up to the call, plus many, many more. Oh! Talk about shutting down the enemy! He can do nothing but run. I could write a book on all of those, but, today I want to talk about one tactic that will stop the enemy in his tracks. Ready? This is a good one!

STOP!

You will never look at a stop sign or a stop light the same again. You know what stop means there–no rolling through it, stopping after the line does not count, you must stop! Stop means STOP! Sit still for a moment. Don’t GO.

Yes, want to resist the enemy? STOP!

Oh! You knew this didn’t you? Or, are you like me? This is the LAST THING you will do when you are getting tired and weary and the enemy is closing in with for the kill. Want is a true confession–I do not struggle with murdering, stealing, lying, coveting, adultery. BUT, the one thing God convicts me over and over about in the 10 commandments is REST–aka, STOP. He has to MAKE ME come to a place of rest. I must have been a horrid infant and toddler. There is something in me that just resists this. I would rather HELP God. I love to tidy up all of the things around me BEFORE I will come to that quiet place to get away with God. I love to finish up all of the “things” I can think of so I can “relax and rest” without distraction. HELLO! See the problem? Relate with the problem?

God means that WHEN we are tired and weary, we just STOP.
God means that WHEN we are feeling the enemy surrounding us on every angle, we just STOP.

How many times do I have to see this principle in the Bible before it becomes my immediate response? How many situations big and small do I face before this is my INSTANT reaction. How long do I study and train until this is my instant reaction? When will it become “muscle memory?”

Oh! I am dreadfully human. My first response is never to STOP. Oh, don’t look pious. Don’t judge me. I suspect it would not be all over the Bible if we didn’t all struggle here. I also suspect that God would not put it on the cute placard (The 10 Commandments) if he didn’t want to be very clear and mince no words. I also suspect that He wouldn’t have used so many examples in the life of Christ.

Remember Mark 6:31? Here it is:

“He said to them, “Come away to a deserted place all by yourselves and rest for a while,” because so many people were coming and going that they didn’t even have time to eat.”

Were they doing anything wrong? No, we don’t wait to pull back until all is in a mess. This is the sure-fire way to STOP THE MESS BEFORE IT HAPPENS. Or, at minimum, be ready for the attack so you never get in the messes that so many of us fall into because we are ambushed.

Even our military retreats.

It is not always the tactic, but how often do the good soldiers sense a big battle looming, see it coming, and they pull back to get ready for a strong, swift, hard attack. Retreating is a key to victory. Retreating gives them time to “access the situation” and get “intelligence.” It gives them time to get support on their side so they can go forward with a decisive victory. Retreating helps the good soldier to fight the good fight.

Now, this is essential if we are to take on the enemy in God’s way, if we are going to fight the GOOD FIGHT. Of course, if we refuse to do this, we cannot fight the good fight. Instead, we are either devoured by the enemy because we sit still  or we step out in the flesh and just fight, strive, walk in the works of the flesh. We HELP the enemy. What a waste of time. What a devastating impact on the world. We fail in the mission. We have casualties.In fact, the greatest casualty may be ourselves.

God has called us to be a warrior. In a culture that has a “quitter” mentality (watched CNN or MSNBC lately), it is easy to develop a lifestyle and mentality that insures that the enemy can take us and use us for friendly fire unless we get training and regularly resist the enemy.

What does this mean? Maybe you are not a “military mom” or you have not had a hubby on the front lines against real life bad guys. Maybe you have not been placed on the frontline to see the enemy face-to-face and been forced to learn how to fight the good fight–you must fight the good fight if you are going to be a mighty warrior, otherwise, you will be a casualty. Maybe you have got out there on the front line once or a bunch only to go back with wounds that are difficult to mend. You sit disabled. You have settled for defeat.

No more! Rise up mighty warrior!

We MUST learn how to be a mighty warrior. We MUST learn and practice ALL of the tactics regularly so they are in “muscle memory” when the enemy comes against us. AND…the enemy WILL come against you and I. It is not about being a good girl and staying out of trouble. If you think that is how tough times are dished out, I want to know what you have done for God lately?  No, the enemy rages against God’s people, the ones who are busy doing what HE says, even more. Just think, who is on the battle lines for our country today? The ones in active service or the ones who are not serving at this time?  Who gets the enemy’s blows?

The enemy is cunning. He is malicious. He will attack where you least expect it. So, you must fight. You cannot hide. You cannot “take it” and it all go away. You certainly cannot afford to shut your mouth and take it. Too much is at risk.

But, how do you fight and what do you do for a fast blow that makes the enemy flee? Glad we got here…

One of the ways is to STOP.

Stop. Sit down. Pull back. Get filled back up. Hear the Commander. Get your plan. Get ready to do EVERYTHING HE SAYS.

Just in case you are still doubting that the good guys get hit or you are presuming that being tired and weary, pressed and pushed only comes with something YOU DO, or better yet what someone else must have done, just look at Jesus. Jesus got weary!

“So Jesus, tired as He was from His journey, sat down [to rest] by the well. It was then about the sixth hour (about noon).” John 4:6  (Amplified Version)

JESUS got weary! JESUS! Pardon the grammar, THAT BE JESUS!!! God, Incarnate.

So, what do YOU do when you get weary? Tired? I don’t know about you, but as for me, this is what it looks like if I am not careful:

I get a little tired…
I get a little pushed and pressed….
I look at my planner—at all of the “stuff” I have YET to do…
I get a little distressed (well, a lot!)…
I get in a frenzy…
I work even harder, only in MANY different directions…
Then, I begin to battle exhaustion…that just makes me more tired and irritable…
Inevitably, at this point things start to BREAK all around me…others call with their to-do’s…my children begin to squabble…and the planner falls on the ground SPILLING all of my “stuff” I have yet to do…
Then, I begin to get in a frenzy…nothing works out…more stuff breaks…more demands on my time…
Oh, then…the fit! More work! All of it compounds! I feel depressed! Then, it is all doom and gloom!
The enemy has me where he wants me and comes in for the kill!

What about you? What are we to do? Go back to John 4: 6…Jesus, when He got tired on His journey, HE SAT DOWN!

When  Jesus was on His journey, He DID get tired! He did have struggles. He did have people who rose up against Him, even to crucify Him. He was betrayed by his dear friend who was WITH HIM. Did He ever take any mis-steps? Well, look at Scripture. Scripture says that He ONLY did the Father’s will. Yet, we see time after time that people rose against Him and what God told Him to do. Even His own mother missed it twice! But, He only did the will of His Father.

Sure He got tired. Sure He got weary. But, even then, He did the Father’s will. He sat down, pulled away. He stopped!

Come apart. That means STOP. Resist the devil. Pull apart to be with the Heavenly Father. Spend some time with Jesus. Learn from Him (Matthew 11: 28-30). He shows us how to STRIVE LAWFULLY (2 Timothy 2: 3-5). That means he tells us how to “fight” with the winning plan. He has called us to fight the good fight. He wants for us to be mighty warriors.

BUT! We must STOP!

Now, that is revolutionary for me! How about you?

I always thought that if you were a good girl, you don’t get a spanking. I thought that you don’t get “hit” if you are a good girl. Isn’t there something that would make “God hit you?” Well, first, this is just the reason that we need to STOP. We need to know who our enemy is. For some crazy reason if we get “hit” by surprise as we are going along, we always think two things:

1. God has hit us.
2. God hits us because we are trying to do what He tells us.

Ever thought that? Well, if you say no, you are either lying or you have gotten this principle down. However, Scripture tells us that we will always be think this thought. Why? Because the enemy is always there when the battle starts (he is the culprit) and one of his tactics is to accuse. He is always accusing. He accuses God before us. He accuses us before God. He accuses us before others. He accuses others before us. He accuses us before us. We may cast down the thought the moment it comes, but it was there. How long does it stay. This is the difference in our power when the enemy hits. If we think that God has hit us, we will “sit down and try to behave,” but we won’t fight. That is not what I mean by STOP. That means we quit. We are not called to quit. We are called to be mighty warriors who are always on a victory parade. We are called and equipped to be overcomers. If we don’t know what we are, whose we are, and who our enemy is, we will lose the battle every time. The enemy would love to keep us there. However, God is calling us to be aware of what is going on and what will happen. He wants for us to know how to fight the good fight. This is why it is key to STOP when things hit you.

Yes, there are times that God will oppose you if you are off track. He will put you in “time-out.” He will sit you on the bench or send you to your room so you can get yourself together and be ready to obey Him. BUT! When you are hit, if you are godly, the “hits” don’t come from God. God disciplines. He never hits. He trains. He never slaps you around. He corrects. He never accuses, condemns, or handles you harshly.

If you do not STOP, tune in to the Heavenly Father, how will you know whether you are being “hit” or “disciplined?” This is essential. How else can you know who is responsible for the “jarring” in your life? How else can you get the answer and the directive on what you are to do to get through the situation?

Now you are with me! Say it!

STOP!!!!

We stop. We do NOTHING. We say NOTHING. We move on NOTHING.

We retreat–pull back, re-fill, re-fuel, re-pack. We retreat to assess the situation–to get the facts, to get counsel, to get a rock-solid strategy, to get a good view of the battlefield. We retreat to call in the resources and get them ready for the fight–our armor, our supplies, our support.

If we miss the retreat, we are fools. It is the key to a fast, strong, decisive victory.

Jesus modeled the lifestyle of the perfect Teacher. From the first of His ministry until His ascension, we see how He handled the enemies that rose against Him. He never stepped out without solitude, time alone with His Father. He showed us in His life how to handle the enemy when he comes forth–resist him and he flees! He showed how to be ready for all of life’s circumstances from daily demands to death on a cross. He used His weapons to prepare for times of warfare and smack-dab-in-the-middle of the frontal assault. He modeled it beautifully for us.

So, what do we do? We learn from Jesus. We learn to STOP. We learn from Jesus how to pull back, rest and refill! We learn how to be a good soldier. We learn how to fight the good fight. So, mighty warrior, when the enemy begins to circle about, what are you going to do? Say it with me…

STOP!

–>  Laugh! Just sit there right now…laugh! Start small…just a little giggle! Then…laugh about laughing! Roll on the floor laughing!  Feel better?

–>  Begin a new Bible Study.  Either find a Bible Study guide…or dig out Words to study on your own!  For Word Studies, I LOVE my Strong’s Concordance. It helps to find all of the references of a certain word of interest. I also love my Vine’s Dictionary. I use it to look up the meanings of the words AND it also has other references for uses in Scripture. Another great help for Word Studies is my good old faithful Webster’s 1828 Dictionary. I LOVE it as a reference to deepen the studies. Usually it helps me to also find OTHER great studies to dig into also! Dig into the Word! It will feed your heart and soul during this tough time!

–>  Meet a friend at the park and let the kids play while you visit.

–>  Go for a drive around the city—look at the lights! Look at flowers. Look at the seasonal changes.

–>  Look at photo albums.  Remember the silly stories!

–>  Watch the sunrise! Or, not an early bird? Watch the sunset!
–>  Collect jokes and funnies! Barb Johnson…Chonda Pierce…Becky Freeman are just a few of my PERSONAL favorites! Get one of their books or videos. Then, snag some mom-time to just kick back and enjoy!

–>  Chocolate! Chocolate Candy…Chocolate Bars…Chocolate Shakes…Chocolate Latte’s…CHOCOLATE! REALLY! Chocolate helps to release endorphins in the brain—plus! It tastes great to boot! So, why not grab a bit for mom-time!
–>  Watch an old movie! Curl up under a great big quilt—even if you have to turn the air down COLD!  Don’t forget to turn down the lights and turn off the phone!
–>  Look at your old school albums!  Your HAIR! Ha! Enough said.
–>  Got a grassy hill nearby? Go to the top and just roll down it! Like a child! (Snowy? Get a sled! And SLIDE!)
–>  Take the kids to the park—just WATCH them! They are adorable!
–>  Begin a “Quote Book.”  Collect quotes that encourage you to keep on, keeping on!  Keep them in a special journal dedicated only to keeping your special quotes.

–>  Memorize your favorite Psalm. Try out Psalm 91…or Psalm 61…or Psalm 35…or Psalm 37…Oh! Enjoy!
–>  Begin a Tea Ministry.  Doing for others ALWAYS lifts even the heaviest spirit.  Get a tea basket to keep your goodies in…visit a shut-in…bless them. Then! Watch the blessing boomerang! You won’t be able to leave without a blessing.

–>  Take the kids to a candy store—sample the Jelly Bellies…or Sweet Tarts…or Sour Gummy Worms.

–>  Fly a kite!

–>  Take a ride in the country.  Turn up your praise music…roll the windows down…sing to the top of your lungs!

–>  Watch a funny video!  Elisabeth and I LOVE to watch old movies like If a Man Answers. It is one of our “chick flicks” that we always watch together. We love it! SO FUNNY! Chonda Pierce is another one of my picks. She is just totally hilarious. My children LOVE old comedy shows like I Love Lucy or The Three Stooges.  Oh, you may want to watch anything! Just find something that will make you laugh hard!

–>  Scrapbook!  Pick photos that you MUST tell the story behind! Kick up your favorite music…spread out your goodies…and Scrap till you drop!
–>  Read a biography of a GIANT in the faith!  My favorites are Corrie ten Boom…Hudson Taylor…George Mueller…Amy Carmichael…Jim and Elisabeth Elliott…etc!

–>  Get today’s newspaper and read the comics!
–>  Get a yo-yo! PLAY!

–>  Make Chocolate Chip Cookies with the kids! On a diet? Take them to someone who blesses you! Include a note of thanks and encouragement for all they do to bless you!
–>  Go out and sit on your boat—watch the stars! (Oh, watch the sunset or sunrise, if you can too!)

–>  Dig into the Bible and study what God says about trials… suffering… faith… death… depression… oppression… warfare… battle…etc

–>  Read a new book! Normally ready non-fiction/how-to’s? Get a fiction book for a change!  Normally read fiction? Get a humorous book! Renew your weary heart and mind!
–>  Take a break and go for a long ride on a motorcycle! Don’t forget your headset and praise music!
–>  Take a hike! Really!  Find a nice nature trail OR go for the tough stuff!!
–>  Go to the mall with your teenager!  ENJOY!
–>  Buy a Mp3 Player and some great praise music—turn it up!  I LOVE my iPod! I have my iPod loaded with all of my favorite CDs. My favorites are Michael W. Smith’s Worship CD’s AND Hillsong’s Praise and Worship!  The moment you enter into worship, you will enter into the very presence of God—so, turn it up and devour the presence of our precious Lord!

–>  Pull out that old sewing machine and make some of those goodies that you have been wanting—new purse/tote…outfit…home decorations…doll clothes…etc!

–>  Buy a “whoopee” Cushion…or “Bubba” teeth… At least your family will laugh!

–>  Write out the funny family stories! Reminisce! Enjoy!

–>  Go skating!

–>  Try an afternoon of “Laser-Tag” with your teens! Get um!

–>  Make Homemade Bread—KNEAD yourself!

–>  Plan a regular Mommy Getaway. This is not an extra! It is essential!  I plan getaways for different purposes: to just get alone with God to hear Him, to plan, to work on my homeschool and business projects, to just fill my cup back up. Decide what will fill you up. What do you need right now? Decide what will help meet that need. Gather your goodies: Bible, journal, iPod, camera (I love taking pictures of little treasures along the way), your planner, your computer/Idea Notebook, etc. Pull aside and take that time to just get-away and fill your cup back up!
–>  Get a pet! My bird, Harley, has ministered to my heart MORE than I could remember! He is just SO funny! HE had the idea to “boogie” for Jesus! I had not danced for years! AND it is decent!  Elisabeth’s new puppy, Pooh, is a TOTAL delight!  I say all the time that she is JOY in fur! She has become my little buddy. She loves to sit with me while I work and follow me around while I am doing my chores. She keeps me in stitches. Struggling? Get a pet just for YOU…see that puppy in the window??
–>  Take the day to go for a flight!  Look at the whole world from a different perspective!
–>  Dance! Turn up your favorite music and dance! Dance your heaviness away! Dance till you laugh! Dance in worship to the Lord! Jump! Lift your hands in praise and worship!

–>  Clean out your house (only if this is NOT your struggle! Ha!). Attack those closets… cabinets… dusty bookshelves… paper piles!
–>  Go out for a cup of coffee…tea…or a good old Coca-Cola! Meet your sweetheart or a mommy pal! Or…take your Bible and make it a special time with the Lord!
–>  Find some silly-putty or slime—PLAY!

–>  Get up earlier (or take regular breaks throughout the day!) for your quiet time! You may feel SO weak that you can barely concentrate—if so, just turn on praise music and lift up your arms in praise and adoration. Watch what happens!  Make a list of your heartaches—lift them to the Father (then, hide them in your Prayer Journal—later they will be a praise record!).  Dig into the Word for comfort…perspective…and hope for tomorrow! Really tough days? Well, when the Israelites had very HOT days, they had to gather MORE manna—in the heat of your battles and toughest trials gather a surplus! It will help you survive your struggle.
–>  Make a quilt. You can EVEN cheat by making it on the sewing machine! ENJOY!
–>  Take an afternoon to go to the movies. Get a big bucket of popcorn…a super-HUGE Coke…sour Gummy Worms (unless you are due a BIG DOSE OF CHOCOLATE!). Take your sweetheart…or a friend if you want to share! Pick a movie that will make you laugh like crazy…OR CRY your eyes out! ENJOY!

–>  Ride three-wheelers! Get MUDDY!
–>  Treat yourself to a leisurely afternoon (or a bunch of afternoons!) at the pool…park…or creek.
–>  Try your hand at BOWLING. Take some friends!

–>  Take time for tea—each day.

–>  Exercise. Swim…walk…jog…hike…go skating…aerobics. Relieves stress AND boosts your health to boot.
–> Learn a new hobby!  What have you been putting off that you have ALWAYS wanted to know? Pottery? Quilting? Flight Training? Smocking? Scrapbooking? Jewelry Making? Sewing? Crochet? Horse-back riding?  Go for it! Now is the PERFECT time.

–>  Treat yourself to a nice looooonnnnnngggg Bubble Bath! Don’t forget to set up your favorite music to play during your Bubble Bath.  Also…be sure to fix a nice cup of tea (or a Latte!) or a nice big Coke that will last till the water gets cold! ENJOY!
–>  Go to the park and just swing—HIGH!

–> Go get an ice-cream cone—with a double dip!

–>  Do a “Promise” hunt in Scripture.  Keep in a “Promise Notebook” of your very own! KNOW that they are yours.
–>  Snuggle up for the afternoon to read a great book!
Got some fresh ideas? Don’t let this limit you! Let your brain GO! Find some things that will fill you back up and take care of you all along the way.
This is not an extra. This is an essential. Carve out time on your calendar today to just take care of mom!

The Donna Reed Show epitomized the super-mom.  Yes, she did it all, and was the perfect role model for women of that era.

What most people do not know is that Donna Reed was executive producer of the show, and was heavily involved in the show’s immense popularity.  This was at a time when women were subjugated to one particular role. Subsequently, the emancipation of women brought them within equal status of the “dominant” male. With a nine to five job; children to care for; and either a single parent or not; moms today are expected to do it all. Thus, the “Super-mom Syndrome” was born; but at what price?

Let’s face it, no one can do it all. This is a big myth. We need to take captive and reveal its lies and deceit.

Trying to do it all has ramifications.

We cannot do it all without experiencing the suffering and stress related conditions adherent to the every day demands placed upon them. Not to mention the costs on the family–so many homes filled with everything but close relationships.

Suffice to say, many moms have tried; some have been successful, while others have been immeasurably consumed by its consequences.  The “Super-mom Syndrome” is exacting a very heavy toll on their home life, business, and physical well-being.

Thirty years ago, the top TV shows were exclusively focused on the housewife–the mom.  Conversely, the shows today highlight single working moms who effortlessly juggle all of the demands placed upon them with flair and ease.  Yes, they sometimes showcase the conflict; but quite frankly, the hype is more conducive to ratings than to real life situations.

The “Super Mom Syndrome” has produced a “Type A” personality, which has contributed to the imbalance and unrealistic expectations imposed by moms who think they can do it all today; but soon realize perfectionism can never outweigh the happiness and fulfillment of simply being a mom, without all of the peripheral trappings.

There is no need to suffer any longer. We can let the trappings of the world go on without us and stay clear from its trap!

But, how?

First, find a balance and strive to stay balanced. Prioritize that which is most important–your husband and children come first.  These days go by too fast. Children are little only for a little while. They will eventually grow up, leaving you with the inconsolable desire to retrieve their childhood years. You don’t get these days back. You will have many, many more years ahead to do the “rest” of the things that are alluring you during these years.

Watch out for the stuff! Resist the temptation to totally immerse yourself in one area during these years. I am not saying that you cannot do anything during these years–I did. But, be on guard! Limit outside involvements whether ministry, service, business, or social. Set up very firm boundaries. Remember that each commitment costs you. The costs add up over the days, weeks, and years. Be picky about what you do with your time. Make each day count.

Say goodbye to “Super-mom” today! Don’t even try to be “Super-mom” when you can be a super mom. Everything has a season. We cannot do it all in ONE season. We need to get a vision for the life of a godly woman. Looking at Proverbs 31 can overwhelm us, but it is a glimpse at the typical LIFE of a godly woman, not the typical DAY of a godly woman. Get a vision beyond today. Tomorrow is coming when the children are grown and gone into the world. These days that are intense with demands will slow down to a spooky quiet that can then be filled with wonderful opportunities that today can be put off for another day. Say goodbye to those opportunities for today.

Sweet friend, enjoy being a wife and mother. Cherish your family. Enjoy them today. You are the heart of the home. You don’t need to be perfect. You can take off the “Super-mom” cape. Decide today to be a mom.

Need more help? Don’t miss our Training Sons, Training Daughters Virtual Seminar this week! http://talk-a-latte.com/tstd.html

Ever had an “unbalanced life?”  Well, the similarities are unbelievable! Talk about a rough ride! Talk about a pull in the wrong direction! Talk about stress! Sure it is easy to fix—but, oh so hard to do!

We are overloaded! Every area of our lives suffers from overload: commitments… possessions… work… information…relationships!

We are a culture that can be characterized as overloaded!  We are busy. Hurried. Overworked. Stressed. Rushed. We exceed our limits. We take on WAY TOO MUCH! As my pastor says, “We write checks that our body and mind cannot cash!”  Our productivity suffers. Our bodies suffer! Our vital relationships suffer. We no longer can hear God as He whispers direction, encouragement, and wisdom along our path. We miss the best! We wonder why we end our days empty and without meaning or accomplishment.

We forget what is most important—or at minimum, put it off for another day.  The important seldom screams for attention, but the urgent, often insignificant, constantly screams for MORE and more! We get so busy and distracted doing the urgent and demanding in life that we lose the opportunity to impact the important, that in which we are given to leave a legacy!

So, how on earth do we get out of this rat race? How are we to restore balance? If we could restore balance, how could we maintain balance?  How could we make life really count for something?  Here are some things that the Lord has been teaching me this year as He has pulled me back from so many GOOD things to restore balance and keep me on the path to leaving a legacy!

SLOW DOWN!

Does that one hurt or what?  We are so fast paced! We live on the “fast track!”  Think of the rat race we live in:  one-hour print…ten-minute oil changes…instant cameras…instant potatoes…instant MICROWAVE meals! Our homes have dishwashers, slow-cookers (don’t be fooled by the name—turn them on as you run out the door for work and have a healthy meal ready to serve at the end of the day!), microwaves, and computers!  Oh, and the computer thing! Yep, I am on my computer now (at our local coffee shop—yep, priorities are nice at times!) enjoying the benefits of my blessed computer complete with its battery, cd-writer, and all of the other MUSTS that I am so spoiled with!  BUT! For heavens’ sake…think of how spoiled we REALLY are! The computer age has taken over sweet little country stores! We have the Internet (which has faced the demand to have MORE instant connections—remember all of those ads this summer?), E-mail (to instantly communicate!), E-books (to instantly receive our products so we don’t have to wait for the dreaded postal service to deliver!!), E-zines, Auto-responders (didn’t REALLY think those were REAL people there all hours of the day and night??!!), Auto-processing of orders/credit cards, and don’t forget Instant Messenger—for those who find Email to be too slow! We have “Drive-Thru’s” for EVERYTHING—food, cleaners, pharmacies, oil changes, and even (PLEASE GASP WITH ME!) funeral homes!  Well…that is where I drew the line! Drive-thru funeral homes!  Where are we as a culture? On the fast track!

What do we do?  Why not Slllllooooowwwww DDDDoooooowwwnnnnn???  I am not advocating that we STOP using technology. Rather, we should use those tools to make life easier and to make the most of our time. HOWEVER, where it really matters—relationships, home, family, homeschooling, our witness, life…where it REALLY matters, we must slow down!  Restoring balance and eliminating overload is simply not possible without slowing down!

Ephesians 5: 15-16 says, “Look carefully then how you walk! Live purposefully and worthily and accurately, not as the unwise and witless, but as the wise (sensible, intelligent people), Making the very most of the time [buying up each opportunity], because the days are evil.” What does this look like? Well, let’s go back to Genesis 33 for a look at the life of Jacob after he completely surrendered his entire life to the Lord.  “My lord knoweth that the children are tender, and the flocks and herds with young are with me: and if men should overdrive them one day, all the flock will die.  Let my lord, I pray thee, pass over before his servant: and I WILL LEAD ON SOFTLY, according as the cattle that goeth before me and the children BE ABLE TO ENDURE, until I come unto my lord at Seir.” Want to slow down, but how? Where do we begin? What can really make a significant difference? Try these:

–> Decide what is MOST important! Think over life for a little while!  What is it that only YOU can do in this life? Why did God create YOU? What is your life purpose? What is it that God created YOU to do?  What can go?  Just as our house cannot be cleaned without getting rid of the clutter—otherwise all we are doing is shuffling the clutter around—likewise, we must take an occasional inventory to de-clutter our life!  I find this to be a battle JUST as many of you probably do and trust me, this is a life principle that I really stick to! Long ago, God impressed upon my heart that if I were going to be able to truly fulfill my calling that He had for my life, I would HAVE to only do the things that *ONLY I* could do—if it were something that anyone else on earth could do, it would have to go!  Still, I will go through periods of my life and begin to get overloaded again only to find when I evaluate the value of all that I do, there are things that sneak into my schedule that vie for my focus and energy! Usually that requires that I take out those really tough pruning shears again to cut back—either by delegating the tasks to someone else so I can be more productive at what ONLY I can do—or even more difficult, get rid of what is overloading me! I know that this is hard, but it is SO key! Take a deep look now at what you are doing.  Is it really eternal? Is it the “main thing?” Is it essential?  Can anyone else do it?  Is it hindering you from the very best?  Decide what is most important. You won’t be sorry!

–> Examine Your Lifestyle! Take a little while to jot down a journal of what makes up your day? Your week? Your month? Your year?  REALLY BE HONEST!  Do those things count?  What are the days filled with: things that are really important…or lots of fires to put out?  Take a bit longer to write out what you would REALLY like to be accomplishing.  What do you think that a “perfect day,” if it were possible, would look like? How can you change your day to really slow it down so your life really counts?

–> Examine Your Motives! Motives will fool us in a heartbeat! Scripture is so very true as it warns us to beware of our heart. We simply cannot trust our hearts. They will lead us astray every time!  What really motivates us? What drives us? If we can determine this, we can evaluate activities and obligations much more effectively!  So, what drives you?  Ambition? Your life call? The desire to be in control? Don’t trust others to do things? Passion? Guilt? Ego? Insecurity (Can’t say “no?” Afraid that you have no value unless you are “seen” busy?) Constantly trying to please others?  Revenge? Money? Oh, I could go on and on…motives are so very deceptive and there are so many. What is your motive? What drives you to do all you do?

Busyness does not mean that we are accomplishing. Nor does busyness guarantee fulfillment.  Often, busyness is the very thing that keeps us from the very things that will bring us satisfaction, fulfillment, and contentment.  Busyness, given the chance, will keep us from fulfilling our life purpose!

It is all up to us! We can choose which way to go! Enjoy the journey or wait to enjoy the brief delight of the destination? A wasted, bitter, defeated life or a life full of purpose and meaning? Burn out or real accomplishment? Deep, passionate relationships or very real regrets?

Why not slow down?  Relax? Enjoy the whole journey—the process getting there AND the destination! Build deep relationships! Stick to those priorities! Simplify life so you reach for the very best!  Seize each moment!

REDEEM THE TIME!

Time! Friend or foe? Have enough time in your day? Or are you a truly kindred spirit, asking God for just a few good 80-hour days and the energy to use them to the fullest? Ha!  I have a good feeling that if your prayer is for that one, that you will also find that God will whisper sweetly in your ear to say that the problem is not that we do not have enough time…or that we are using time to the fullest…or even that we waste time. Rather, He would say that we need to make it our ambition to redeem the time—each and every moment we are given!

A few months back, my pastor taught a series of messages entitled From Burnout to Balance. In his series, he challenged us to look at time as a great big “bank account.”  He said that this account is one that we are guaranteed to have daily deposits made on our behalf by God each and every day.  We each get our fair share.  No one gets more. No one gets less.

Think of this awesome gift! Each and every day we are given a gift that can impact all of eternity—or be squandered away into oblivion.  Each day we are given this gift without any regard to our stewardship from the day before! TWENTY-FOUR HOURS! ONE-THOUSAND, FOUR HUNDRED, FORTY MINUTES! EIGHTY-SIX THOUSAND, FOUR HUNDRED SECONDS!  Deposited in our “account” each and every day!

And…with this gift, we are free to use it in any way we choose.  We can waste it or use it wisely.  We can make a difference—or misuse it!  But! One thing is guaranteed each day with all that is deposited on our behalf—it must be used up before the end of the day…it cannot be carried into tomorrow!

We all have 24 hours put into our spending account each and every day.  What we do with that time is in our hands! Will we be faithful? Will we use it wisely? Will we make it count for eternity? Will we use our gift to the fullest? Will we use our gift for what really counts?

If we want to live a life of balance, we must guard this precious gift!  We must measure our time as one of our greatest resources we have to invest in this life!  This requires that we go back to our precious Giver and seek HIM for how we can most faithfully invest each moment! We must let Him be the Lord of our schedule, our to-do’s, our calendar.  We must commit our way—ALL OF OUR WAY—to Him from our work to our studies that we pursue to our commitments to our books that we read to the activities that we participate.

We must be careful to set a guard on our time to be sure that we do not flippantly do without thinking or take on too much that we forfeit the best!  We need to purpose to really do those things that are “NEEDFUL” (remember Luke 10: 38-42?) and not just the “stuff” that we think MUST be done! We need to constantly evaluate our choices and weigh them to see if they are truly those things that help us to reach our life call.

Time…what do you think? Redeem this precious gift so our lives can be balanced? You bet!

SELL OUT COMPLETELY TO GOD’S WILL!

Does this scare you to death? Are you seeing visions of little grass huts…no electricity…bugs…complete with the stench of underarm odor?

Oh, beloved! My first image of total surrender to God admittedly envisioned life on a continent that was far, far away from all of the comforts of home. Still have no idea if there is a continent that could be as disgusting as my visions were.  Sure, I trusted God for eternity, but never thought of heaven in the same way that I thought of my life on earth totally surrendered to Him!

Now, as we move into our 21th year as a ministry, I HAVE to tell you that God has a very, very good plan for us!  He does not call us, equip us, and then send us to an assignment that forfeits our trust and confidence in Him!  In fact, one thing that I am thrilled to say is that although there IS work in our calling, there is delight and fulfillment that cannot be found in anything else under the sun! Seeing His provision is unbelievable. Watching His anointing fall is indescribable!  Plus! No grass huts so far!

Give your ALL to God!  Sell out! Don’t hold anything in reserve!  Abandon ALL for the call!

Scared? Just give Him a try! Take a look at Jeremiah 29 in The Message Bible.  God says to us, “I know what I’m doing, I have it all planned out—plans to take care of you, not abandon you, plans to give you the future you hope for. When you call on me, when you come and pray to me, I’ll listen.  When you come looking for me, you’ll find me. Yes, when you get serious about finding me and want it more than anything else, I’ll make sure you won’t be disappointed.”  Oh, beloved, not only will you never, ever be disappointed, but you will find that His GOOD plan will be truly good–satisfactory for you, satisfying, fullfilling, completely sufficient!

Wonder JUST WHAT could YOU do?  Too young? Too old? Too poor? Not qualified—or so you think? Well, beloved! Know that God has called each and everyone of us to function in His Body.  We are the mouthpieces here on earth for Him. We are the feet for Him. We are the hands here in our community for Him! He has called and equipped each and every one of us to be a part of His Body here on earth! We each have talents, spiritual gifts, natural bents and interests, and experiences that can minister to those that are growing in the Body AND those that need to join the Body of Christ!  God needs ALL of us working and functioning properly if His Kingdom—His way of doing things—will come to earth!  He needs for us to be that light that shines in the darkness to bring others to Him.  Just go into a dark, dark room… Light one candle… See what a difference YOU can make right where you are!

Have no idea what His plan is for you?  Take a look at Romans 12: 1-2.  He promises in verse two that YOU can know His good, perfect, and acceptable will for you!  Yes, YOU can know that plan!  How? Going back through this passage, we see how:

–> Become a living sacrifice—EVERYDAY! Completely yielded. Completely dedicated. Completely committed to Him and His Way!  Giving Him our ALL! All that we are: our plans…gifts…bents…talents… ambitions… ideas… methods… techniques… fears… delights…concerns… all presented to God as a living sacrifice EVERY SINGLE DAY! If we truly desire to know the good, acceptable, perfect will of God for ourselves or our children, we must first obediently present ourselves as a complete, living sacrifice.  There may be things in our lives (things that are very precious and difficult to get rid of) that must be burnt up as a sacrifice for us to be prepared to receive God’s very best OR we may find that what we bring to sacrifice before the Lord is acceptable in His sight and can return home with us (like Abraham as he willingly prepared to sacrifice his beloved Isaac).  However, the key is not in what God does with our sacrifice, it is in our heart coming before Him daily, presenting ourselves and all that we have before His throne!

–> Don’t not conform to the world; but conform to Christ!! Yep! We either conform to the world or to Christ! We cannot live for one without forsaking the other!  Want to know God’s plan?  Let go of the world’s standards, the world’s ways, the world’s requirements, the world’s traditions, and the world’s bondage. Let go of the lies of the world! We must stop serving the world at the expense of becoming ALL that God wants for us to become! If we want to live an abundant life—a balanced life—the world’s way will never work!  Only God’s way brings balance, freedom, and true, abundant LIFE that we are really searching for! As we grow in relationship with Christ, daily become LIKE HIM, we find security and LIFE! We find peace! We find hope! We find the direction that we have been looking for all along the way!  We find freedom to become ALL that God designed for us to become! Talk about LIFE! We move beyond balance to abundant life!

–> Be transformed by the daily renewal of your mind! The last key to getting to know God’s plan!  However, this one is SO VITAL!  If we truly want to live a balanced, abundant life, we must sell out to God’s will. BUT, however much we want to sell out, unless we truly let Him change our life, we will just spin our wheels in the same ruts, never becoming all that God wants for us to become! How is our mind transformed? Life changed? This life transformation begins as we sit at the feet of Jesus.  As we daily immerse ourselves in His Word, we will begin to be transformed.  Then, we will soon have different priorities… different beliefs… different ambitions… and soon, we will be able to prove what is good, acceptable, and perfectly in the will of God.  If we never experience this transformation, we will always find ourselves burdened under a yoke of bondage.  We will always find ourselves looking in all the wrong places for direction, approval, meaning, purpose, and rest!  We will constantly battle overload. We will find life bumpy and pulling us into life’s “ditches!”

God has a precious plan EVEN for you! Surrender ALL to Him! Let Him have it all! Let Him do His work in you! Don’t rush! Don’t drag around! Don’t run from it!  Live EACH day letting Him have your ALL in complete abandonment! Balance will come—but, beloved there is so much more that will rush into your life! Purpose, meaning, abundant life! Go for it!

BUILD MARGIN—BREATHING ROOM—INTO YOUR LIFE!

Ever been at rock bottom?  We see many of our favorite Bible characters that we get to know during good times, but I think my favorites are those that we get to see when they are rock bottom, with NO breathing room, at the point that my mother would have said, “I’ve HAD IT!”  Ever just “HAD-IT?”

Imagine for yourself the grief and utter pain that Job was experiencing as he cried out in Job 3:26, “I have NO peace, NO rest, NO quiet!”

Drop into the conversation with Paul as he declared that he got to his “breaking point” in 2 Corinthians 1: 8-9, “For we do not want you to be uninformed, brethren, about the affliction and oppressing distress which befell us in the province of Asia, how we were so utterly and unbearably weighed down and crushed that we despaired even of life itself.  Indeed, we felt within ourselves that we had received the very sentence of death, but that was to keep us from trusting in and depending on ourselves instead of on God Who raises the dead.”

Finally, journey back to 1 Samuel as we are first introduced to Hannah at the point of utter desperation—you probably know a bit about her story. Barren. Broken. Taunted (by her husband’s other WIFE!! Who had NO problem bearing children!). Empty. Crushed in soul. Oh, let’s join her at the point that she had “HAD IT!”… “Crushed in soul, Hannah prayed to God and cried and cried—inconsolably. Then, she made a vow: Oh, God-of-the-Angel-Armies, If you’ll take a good, hard look at my pain, if you’ll quit neglecting me and go into action for me by giving me a son, I’ll give him completely, unreservedly to you. I’ll set him apart for a life of holy discipline…” As she was praying, she sunk even lower as she was completely misunderstood by the priest, who thought she was DRUNK!  We hear more of her heart in her reply to him… “Oh no, sir—please! I’m a woman hard used. I haven’t been drinking. Not a drop of wine or beer. The only thing I’ve been pouring out is my heart, pouring it out to God.  Don’t for a minute thing I’m a bad woman. It’s because I’m so desperately unhappy and in such pain that I’ve stayed here so long!”

Relate?  I know that these precious vessels were crying out in the midst of trials and life events that were too much. However, I don’t think that we find ourselves at the point of desperation without first pushing limits for quite some time!  We haven’t got margin to deal with the daily-ness of life—much less those life struggles, crisis situations, losses, and persecutions that inevitably knock most of us off our “rocker” into despair!

Think about it…if you are the average person in our society today, you live on fast-food, crazy hours, no sleep. You are chronically rushed (or late), overworked, exhausted, overloaded! What is the solution?  Build MARGIN! Build some BREATHING ROOM!  Simplify life so there is room for change…space for disruptions.  How?  Here are some suggestions that I am trying to implement in my own life:

–> Accept HUMAN Limitations! Can you sense how HARD that is for ME to type? Oh, here it where it gets harder, it is not MY idea, it is the Word of God too: “I have seen that EVERYTHING HUMAN has its limits and end no matter how extensive, noble, and excellent.”  (Psalm 119: 96a)  OUCH! If there is a battle for balance (and YOU KNOW there is!), this is one of the biggies! We ALL have limits! But, where we need more margin is that we don’t say “NO” when we face limitations!  As I shared above, we “write checks our body and mind cannot cash!”  The world says, “You can have it ALL!”  “You can do it all!”  Even the church gives the illusion that “I can do ALL THINGS through Jesus Christ.”  However,  the Bible is very clear that we can ONLY DO those things that are HIS THINGS—HIS WILL! WE have limits! We have space limits. We have body limits. We have emotional limits.  Jesus does not give us a blank check to do ALL THINGS. Much less, Jesus WILL NOT empower us to do ALL THINGS.  He only empowers us to do those things that HE CALLS us to do.  He never gives us anything that is beyond our abilities  and resources to do.  One clear way to judge what we are called to do from those things that  we are not called to do is to look at our limitations: our red lights, shut downs, overloads, crashes.  We need to look at those warning signs: pain, fatigue, stress, irritability, frustrations.  Our human limitations are God’s boundaries in our lives that help us to know that we are overextended and writing checks our bodies and minds cannot cash. Respecting human limitations will restore balance to even the most overloaded life!

–> Expect Interruptions! Proverbs 22:3 says, “A prudent man sees trouble coming and ducks—a simpleton walks in blindly and is clobbered!” If there is one thing in life that is FOR SURE, we can be sure that life seldom goes as planned.  Life cannot be predicted.  Just think about it…what truly messes up your schedule?  Traffic? Car trouble? Delays? Crisis situations? Special needs along the way? We must plan for interruptions or our lives will constantly be out of balance, our schedules will never work, and much of life will be squandered!  Expect interrruptions and plan room for them into every day!

–> Put SPACE Into Your Schedule! Ever had your PDA/Planner/Calendar/ Briefcase complain about an overstuffed schedule?   Actually my planner looks so much more “professional” when it is PACKED OUT! Only I don’t handle it so well! For the last few years, I have really evaluated what I was doing that was causing me to get off my schedule and not get around to all of my to-do’s.  Now, granted, some days it is ME or my darling little ones!  But, overall, 95% of my schedule woes are also the culprit behind life getting just way too busy—OVER-SCHEDULING!  Schedules, like daily life, only work when there is SPACE in each day! Just like we see with the life of Christ (see Matthew 5-10), our life is filled with distractions, interruptions, crisis situations. We can battle against these OR we can add margin (space) into our lives that gives us room to use these as THE MAIN THING—opportunities for ministry, opportunities for the very best lessons, teachable moments, hands-on discipleship!  Not only are we able to step up to the call as it beckons us, but we are less likely to spin out of balance constantly!

–> Prune Life To Yield MORE Fruit! Several years ago, one of my dearest friends bought her DREAM land.  Every time that I go to visit her, our family laughs because just driving up her driveway I begin to see a view that rivals that of the gorgeous view on The Sound of Music, thus tempting me to begin to sing—“The HILLS ARE ALIVE…with the sound of music…”  The land is gorgeous.  But it is more than that. It is also productive!   However, at first it wasn’t.  Rhea bought the land, complete with an orchard.  Sound ready to go?  Well, not exactly! Needing a bit of help with her fruit trees, she called in a professional.  To her shock, she looked outside to find her precious orchard looking like a bunch of sticks in the dirt. Pruning began to have a whole new meaning! What looked like devastation actually was the key to those best fruit ever! Bigger fruit! Sweeter fruit! MORE fruit!  I remember the year that Rhea was getting her first fruits after the pruning. It was a year that I needed that practical example of pruning just so I would have the nerve to let God loose with His pruning shears! I can’t say it was easy! It was probably one of the most challenging times in my entire life. I had lived my life pretty much just without much thought. However, God was wanting for me to yield up EVERYTHING  so He could prune back all that was diseased…all that was broken…all that was zapping my strength…all that was causing double-vision…all that was keeping me from bearing the fruit He had planned from the foundation of the earth.  1 Corinthians 6: 12a says, “Everything is permissable (allowable and lawful) for me; but not all things are helpful (good for me to do, expedient and profitable when considered with other things).” There are many GOOD things that God would not have a problem if I were to do them.  However, those good things can keep me from producing all of the fruit that I can bear. It becomes a choice thing for me.  I can choose whether I will allow Him total control of my entire life—even the schedule… commitments… my going… my doing.  I am the ONE who can sit down, yield to the shears, and stay ready to bear more and more fruit. Likewise, I can also resist.  But…I don’t really like that alternative!

At the end? At your limit constantly? “HAD IT?”  Take a good look look at life! Check for margin! Not enough? Build margin! Create space! Watch what happens!

DE-STRESS!

Yep! Gulp! De-stress!  This one got you out of whack before too?  You are not alone, beloved!

Want to know the #1 complaint in our culture?  What about among homeschool moms? The booger behind despair? The reason that most quit?  The reason that many never begin?  You have got it! The stress! The chaos! The mess! The lack of organization or ability to “keep it together.”  Want to battle for balance? This little devil will give you quite a challenge!

Yep! If there is a need among the body of Christ, this JUST might be it!  But, how?  Here are some quick tips for restoring balance when it all gets bumpy from the stresses of life…

–> Find Your Stressors! What throws YOU for a loop?  What takes you into a “nose-dive?”  What “stalls” your flight? What are your biggest stressors?  What causes YOUR stress?  Identify the REAL culprit—HINT: it is NOT your husband (!!) or your children (!!) or God (!!).  Look at your life honestly!  What REALLY stresses you out? Holding onto your stress? Carrying a burden you do not have to carry? Anxiousness? Discontent? Strife? Expectations? Willfulness instead of willingness and total surrender and total abandonment? Find YOUR stressors! Know what REALLY “punches” your buttons!

–> PLAN! Plan ahead! Well in advance! One saying that always pops into my head when I think of the word plan is, “If we fail to plan, we really plan to fail!” Nothing brings MORE stress than living life without direction, without a plan, always under “crisis” management, making decisions on a moment-by-moment basis.  If this is stressing you out, try to plan ahead! Plan out your goals. Plan out your schedule. EVEN the mundane things—plan out those daily routines, even going so far as to write them out! How does this help? Well, decisions are made, saving those precious brain-cells for other uses! Trust me this works WONDERS! So, plan! Plan well! Don’t wait until the last minute! Plan…then, you can settle in to go a slow pace!

–> Write it DOWN! Give your brain a rest! Talk about stressing out—our brains will stress out if we are keeping all of our to-do’s…plans…goals…heartbeats…EVERYTHING on our brain! Write it down! Not only will it help to keep things from slipping between the cracks, but it will also help us to evaluate where we have come from and where we have to go.  Plus, the best yet! We will have a sense of accomplishment when we look back!

–> Watch that attitude! There are going to be some life-stresses that quite honestly cannot be changed! However, we need not walk in a life of defeat and stress! Instead, when we recognize life-stresses that cannot change, that is the time to sit right down at the feet of Jesus! Ask Him to show the purpose. At minimum, KNOW that victory is guaranteed! There is no temptation or trial that is original with any of us! Nor is there anything that we are allowed to walk in that is not first filtered through the loving hands of God. He always guarantees VICTORY!  So, watch that attitude! When things cannot change, change what can—that perspective…that attitude!!

–> Delegate! What is it that makes it so hard for moms to get help? Our children LOVE to be Mommy’s helpers! We really steal their blessings when we do not delegate to them.  Even toddlers can help fold a load of laundry! Don’t try to do it all by yourself!  Delegate and you will find some of the stress dissipating!

–> Get enough rest! Oh! This one is soooo tough for me! But, let’s honestly look at what happens in our families when we get tired:  don’t get enough sleep>get cranky>don’t enjoy life>not too great to be around> others get cranky> irritates you more>get more tired… Why not simply get that rest?? Sleep AND that rest in body, spirit, and soul!

–> Self-control! Hummmm… Such a challenge!  However, we will find ourselves constantly stressed out until we learn to say “NO” to those activities, commitments, all that stuff!  Bit-by-bit, they wear us down. Saying, “NO” eliminates the whole threat of stress from the onset!

–> Keep it simple! Don’t overload! We already KNOW we cannot do everything, but we have to remember this when choices are there to be made! Always look at anything new, whether an activity or a possession, judging its importance by what you are willing to swap for it.  This works for everything—shoes, books, activities, commitments. Keep it simple! You can’t do or have everything, so go for the very best!

–> Give yourself a break! Don’t pick yourself to death NOR let others pick you to death either!  It is so easy to focus on the negative, get overwhelmed by the weaknesses and inadequacies, and get frustrated about how far you have to go! Then, PEOPLE sure do not help! Let another person loose in your life with the license to critique you or your situation and you will be ready for the nut-farm!  Give yourself a break! See this thing as a process—you will not arrive until it is all over but the shoutin’ so relax, enjoy life, and give yourself a break!

–> Find ways to fill your cup! We are each wired so very different. Certain things stress some of us that do not bother others. Likewise, certain things just fill our cup!  STOP! Step back! Shift into low gear –or reverse!  Do what it takes to DE-STRESS!  Rest! Relax! Rejuvenate! Renew! Refill! Whatever it takes, find those things that fill YOU back up! Oh! The benefits go beyond de-stressing and restoring balance—you finally have living water to pour forth into the lives of others!

–> Make the most of EVERY minute! Cherish this time! Make sweet memories! Take time for the most important—the best things! Your husband! Your children! Your family life!  Don’t let life just slip by! Look at life and decide what you would do if this were your last year…last month…last week…last day?  Would you go to the park to enjoy watching them play?  Would you cuddle up and read a great book? Would you take off to the beach?  Why not make those things YOUR thing? Oh, and probably find that education can be EASY along the way too!

De-stress!  Crawl up into the great big comfy arms of our loving Heavenly Father! Let Him hold you during the most turbulent or trivial stresses of life! Let Him restore your spirit! What you are doing is vital! Your enemy wants you stressed out, overloaded, out of balance!  He is defeated! When he snarls, throws forth his darts, and lies to you, just snuggle up closer to your Lord! Give Him the struggles! Give Him expectations! Give Him every single burden! You won’t be sorry!

GET BACK TO THE MAIN THING! RELATIONSHIPS!

Remember Matthew 22: 37-40?  Jesus was asked, “What IS the most important thing? The bottom line? The main thing?”  I love Jesus’ ability to summarize ALL of life in ONE response! He summed up the main thing in three commands: to love God with all our heart, soul, mind, and body…to love others as ourselves…and obviously, to love ourselves!  Do you see this? The MAIN THING…the BOTTOM LINE..THE most important thing was relationships!  However, when we get overloaded, the very first thing that we skimp on is relaitonships!

Want to restore balance and get rid of all of that overload?  Take a deep look at the MAIN THING!  Anytime things are out of balance, take a look to see how relationships are doing? Are they being “put off” until the pressures go away?  Are they quiet while the rest of the “stuff” screams, demands, and pulls you to pieces?

Ask God to constantly keep you attuned to relationships in which you are charged with ministry.  Ask God to show you ways that you can love and minister to Him.  Ask Him to quicken you all along the way with ideas and precious opportunities for ministering to those you are called to minister to—your husband, your children, your parents, your siblings, those that come within your sphere of influence. Cry out to Him to help you guard your time so moments do not slip away leaving a hole in this vital area of life!

SO…WHAT DO YOU THINK???

Ready to get out of this rat race? Ready to restore balance? Make life really count?  Sit at the feet of Jesus! Snuggle up close! Listen for each beat of His heart! Let Him pull you back  from that “stuff.” Let Him show you how to let go of those GOOD things and grab onto the very best!  Give Him a chance to restore balance and set us on the path to leaving a legacy!

Need MORE Help?

Check out Cindy’s New Organized Mom Super Set! It is full of great ebooks and audios that will help take you by the hand and plan the best homeschool year ever! Plus! When you purchase your set you get MORE help with record-keeping, organization, and setting up your home to learn–you also get access to Cindy’s Organization 911 Seminar Set and her newest Seminar Set, Let’s Get Organized for the New School Year. Yep! Both! Complimentary!  Get your set here:

http://www.cindyrushton.com/OrganizedMomSet.html

Sweet friend, I have been there. Actually, I was so deeply depressed that the best way to describe it is to think about the Grand Canyon with no apparent way out. That is how I felt. I felt too tired and weary to even begin the ascent back out. I was overwhelmed with the load. I could not go on the way I was going any longer.

I do have good news!

God healed me from depression. He broke the chains that bound me for far too long. He gave me a new beginning. I have never gone back. Now, this does not say that I am living in some fantasy world. Sweet friend, I KNOW depression. But, I hate it. I do not ever want to go there again.

Wondering, how do you stay away? How do you stop its vicious attack right in its tracks? That is why I am writing this. There are some very practical things that you can do when you feel the attack come on. In fact, you can try these things when you are in the pit. They will really help out. Ready? Try this…

Get a God-getaway.

Ok…let’s get real here. How long has it been since you have taken some time apart to get filled to overflowing with God? A while? One of the best pieces of advice that I got when I was in the pit came from a dear friend. I called her one day when I was really battling. She told me to get face down on the floor and just pour out everything to God–all my pain, all my disappointment, all my brokenness, all my anger, all my grief. EVERYTHING. She told me that I was not to get up until it was all gone and that sweet peace of God flooded in. She told me to realize that God, my precious Abba Father, was there and He wanted for me to pour out everything from the very depths of my soul. He wanted to bear that ENTIRE burden. At that moment, I was holding on and trying to handle my grief of losing 7 babies and my anguish over the disappointment in my spouse and the rubbish in our marriage. It looked like there was no hope. Yet, as I poured it all out, God flooded me with peace and that hope that I needed to get up and go on.

Sweet friend, what is going on? Have you taken it to your Abba Papa? Have you carried it long enough? Have you just poured it out? Sweetie, it is time to lay it down. It is time to run into the arms of your loving Heavenly Father and just pour it all out. Tell Him EVERYTHING that is on your heart. I know you may not tell your earthly father everything, but your Heavenly Father does not want you to hold back.

Mad? Tell Him!  He can take it!

Don’t understand? Tell Him! Ask Him to help you understand!

Hurt? Describe it all to Him. Pour it out.

Disappointeed? Tell Him what you wanted and why you are hurting from the disappointment. Ask Him to show you HIS vision. Ask Him to show you why He would allow this to happen to you. Ask Him to show you His heart.

Dear friend, if you are down, broken, hurting, or downright depressed, it is time to get a God-getaway. Pull back. Pour it out. Soak Him in. Don’t get up until you feel that sweet peace rush over you. Don’t move on until you have that hope that can keep you going on!

Get a Quiet Time–DAILY!

I can hear you! You are saying, “But, Cindy…I don’t have time! My house is a mess, my life is a mess, and my kids are going crazy! The last thing that I can do is have some sappy quiet time!”

Did I hear you fully?

Sweet friend, I know you have 5 minutes. If not, it is past time to grab it!

Keep it simple and easy! Grab your Bible and dig in each day. Just read a bit. Don’t know where to begin? Try the Psalms. Many are bite-size. Just pull out your Bible, read the first one. Soak it in. Really sift it for a treat today. Each day, do the same thing. You are not on a marathon or Bible challenge. Just keep it simple and easy. Actually, this will not even take 5 minutes. In 5 minutes you could probably participate in a daily Bible reading challenge. I don’t want you doing that right now. Right now, be still. Soak in God’s Word. Let it fill those dry places. Slow down and let Him speak to your heart and soul. See what happens!

Oh! Maybe you have another hindrance. You don’t “GET” the Word. Sweet friend, I have been there. God wants for you to understand His Bible. Have you ever tried a different translation? There are countless translations and versions of the Bible. Some of them are written in everyday conversational style. Those just jump out with God’s love for you and His direction. Don’t let the translation be a hindrance. Look at newer translations or versions like The Message (my personal favorite) or NLT (New Living Translation) or NIV (New International Version)…on and on.  Go to a bookstore and test it. Read a few passages. See how they speak to you. Pick the one that just draws you in and feeds your spirit and mind. It will make a big, big difference!

Quiet times don’t have to be hard. In fact, they SHOULD NOT be hard. Keep it simple and easy. Keep the focus upon pouring your heart out to God and listening to Him speak through His Word. Don’t go on day-after-day-after-day without your spiritual food! Make time each and every day for a quiet time with God.

Take Care of Yourself!

You are created in the image of God. You are spirit, soul, and body. You cannot neglect any of it without serious ramifications–depression is one of the most serious!

More than likely if you are down or depressed, you have neglected one or more of these areas for far too long.

Sweet friend, you HAVE to take care of yourself. It is not an option. It is not an extra. It is an essential!

I know the chatter out there about how that if you were a godly person, you would never experience depression. RIGHT!  (reminds me of Job’s friends )

That COULD be true. However, at one of my most precious times of my life spiritually, I allowed the enemy to take me captive and torture me with depression simply by not taking good care of myself.

Don’t buy the lie! Godly people DO get depressed.

In fact, think of some of the greatest men and women throughout history–Job, Elijah, Hannah, Spurgeon, on and on. They battled this giant. It had NOTHING to do with their position in Christ–their godliness, their righteousness. Well, except that the enemy wanted to devour them! Of course, he wants to devour and destroy all of us! You have to be on guard. If you think that spirituality is your safeguard, beware! The enemy will shackle you very quickly. Take care of yourself!

Take a Walk–Daily!

Want something that you could do that will make a big difference? Walk!

Don’t discredit it! Walking is SUPER for you. If you are depressed, how long since you have taken a nice walk? A while? Probably.

Grab your iPod and those walking shoes. Get outside. A 20-30 minute walk will do wonders. Try an hour prayer-walk. It will do MIRACLES!

You have probably read all of the perks through the years–balances your hormones, increases endorphins, clears your mind, Stills your spirit, gets you in shape, on and on. ALL of those things can help you when you feel down. All of those can help you walk out of the pit of depression. So, take a walk–daily!

Whatcha Eating???

Did you suspect that I would ask this one? Stick with me, dear friend!

Caffeine? Caffeine is mood-altering. It affects our ability to cope. I know it hurts, but try cutting it cold turkey–completely cutting it! Take an Aleve for the headache. Take a nap (a great idea anyway…more on that in a bit). You will begin to see a drastic difference in the way you feel emotionally.

Sugar? Same thing! Sugar will give you a rush of energy and excitement and will crash you out. Depressed, cut back your sugar intake. See if there is a difference.

Fruits, veges, proteins??? Are you eating a well-rounded diet? Are you eating a lot of processed foods? Try a fresh salad. Try baked salmon or chicken. See if these help.

Breakfast? Oh! YES! Are you grabbing your Coca-Cola or coffee and skipping breakfast? Wonder why you feel so tired and weary? Grab some hot oatmeal. Include some protein first thing. See if you get more balanced out emotionally as you balance out your eating.

Skipping meals? Humm…skipping meals and wondering why you feel bad? Talk about the worse thing for your blood sugar levels. And, blood sugar levels completely affect your moods. Every three hours, choose either a healthy meal or a healthy snack. See if that doesn’t help you very quickly.

Get Some Sleep!

Years ago, the first thing I noticed, as my doctor put me on Celexa for depression, was my need for more sleep. I could not help it. I crashed in the middle of the day every day. I also had to go to bed at a decent hour or I just crashed. It took about a year to get my sleep patterns regulated, but the change was as distinct as night and day.

Years and years have gone by. I still have to really watch my sleep. If I burn the candle on both ends, I pay. I don’t feel very well. I get grumpy. I get snappy. It doesn’t take much before I feel down.

I don’t want to go back into the pit of depression. There are certain things that I simply have to guard against. Sleep deprivation is one of the biggies.

How is your sleep? Are you staying up WAY TOO LATE? Are you getting up so early that you are sinking mid-morning? Are you able to slow down during the day and take a quick nap? Are you getting up all night with babies, sick little ones, or a sick family member, but trying to go on as though life is the same?

Sweet friend, you NEED your sleep. It is so important that God commands in Scripture that we even have a DAY OF REST. I think it is interesting why He says we need the Sabbath each week–to remember that HE IS GOD. Hummm…thought about that one?  Boy, that hit me between the eyes!

For a long time, I burned the candle on both ends. It was because of many, many good things that I felt that God wanted for me to do. I was “helping” Him. OUCH! The “ox was always in the ditch” on Sunday. The work just could not be done unless I stayed up late and got up early. It did not take long until this really made me sick, physically and mentally.

Today, I am strict with myself about rest. My Sabbath begins each week on Saturday evening and always continues  for 24 solid hours–more if I can. My daily bedtime is with my husband who gets up early. I rarely get up before him. And, if I am feeling bad or feeling down, I take a nap. It makes a world of difference!

So, have you been resting? God made you with a need for rest. He COMMANDS us to rest, just like He commands us to be faithful to our spouses, honor/obey our parents, never kill or steal or covet. Think about rest in that light. It is very serious when we do not rest. So, sweet friend, it is not an option–get some sleep!

Let Go!

Ok! If I haven’t meddled enough already, this one gets down to the heart. I only hit this one because we need to get honest. We need to get real. If you have battled with depression, too many people will tip-toe around this because they don’t want you mad at them. I am going to hit it because I want to see you HEALED. I want to see you WELL.

So….

Is there anything you need to let go of?

Maybe it is your past? Has it held you in chains long enough? Or…do you enjoy fellowshipping with your sad story and wrongs that have been committed long, long ago. I am NOT making light of abuse or pain from your past. But, are you letting the enemy defeat you and steal your life because of that? When are you going to let it go so you can move on? When are you going to let God into your life so He can bring your healing? Do you love your past more than you love God? Trust me beloved, the healing feels much, much better than picking at the scab from this wound. You can be free! You can live victoriously! You can break from the chains that have bound you long enough. Just let go of that past–every bit of it. Unwrap every finger. Let it fall away. Grasp onto all that Jesus Christ died to give you!

Maybe it is unforgiveness? Ok! Sure that I am meddling? Yep! And proud of it!  Sweet friend, I am not making light of what was done to you. Instead, your only hope is forgiving. Forgive God for whatever you think He had to do with it–sweet friend, God is not the one who did that to you. Where was He? He was right there wanting to help you through it all. Have you run TO HIM or FROM HIM? It makes a big difference! Until we run TO HIM, we cannot grasp onto the comfort, compassion, healing, love, mercy, wisdom, and understanding that is ours. Mad at God, today is the day to pour it out and let that go!  Forgive those who hurt you. Yes, everyone of them. Wipe the slate clean for them AND YOU. The big test is how you are able to treat them–can you welcome them with the same enthusiasm as your very best friend? Do you keep them at arms length and shut them out? Would you treat them just like your best buddy? If they asked for the same thing that your best friend asked for, what would you do?  Our hearts are deceitful. They will keep us in chains. We need to learn how to walk in the spirit of forgiveness. Now, I am not saying to open the door for someone to abuse you again. I am saying open your heart to love again. To love them with 1 Corinthians 13 love–OUCH! Everyone of us needs forgiveness. Really realizing how easy it is for us to hurt others, including God, can humble us and bring us to the point of forgiving those who sin against us. No one can sin against us as much as we sin against God. We can offer up those wounds to God, knowing that Jesus paid the price to bring wholeness and healing to every one of those wounds. So, need to take some wounds to the cross today? Take them. Lay them down. 70 X 7 times if needed! Forgive! Let go of all unforgiveness.

Maybe it is unreasonable (AND reasonable!) expectations? Tired of trying to be super-mom? Tired of being a mommy martyr? Girlfriend, I AM DONE with super-mom! For years, people put me and my family in a position where me and my kids were expected to be PERFECT (for real!) because we homeschool…because I write about the godly home…because I teach Bible studies…on and on. People have been so presumptious that my children got sick and tired of the pressures. I did too! I decided that enough was enough. We had people tell us anything from what we were SUPPOSED to wear to what we were SUPPOSED to read to the Bible we were SUPPOSED to use to how I am SUPPOSED to feed my family to what we were SUPPOSED to act like…on and on. Maybe you battle with pressures from others that feel so pressing, yet are really unreasonable. We need to KNOW them and recognize them for what they are. We don’t have to GO THERE! And…let’s go one step further…reasonable expectations. There are times that we COULD get things done or we COULD expect ourselves to react a certain way. Yet, sometimes those very expectations become unreasonable because they are just plain and simple TOO MUCH. We are human. We all have limitations. We all mess up. Maybe you are down and out because you have tried to be little Miss Perfect for long enough and you keep on messing up. Maybe you are down and out because you have tried to be the model Christian, instead of just BEING who you are in Christ. Maybe you are down and out because you COULD do things, yet today you just need to pull back. Let go!

Maybe I have not even touched what you need to let go of…

…anger
…circumstances beyond your control
…bitterness
…offense
…disappointment
…failures
…broken, shattered dreams
…yesterday
…negative thinking
…negative talking
…defeat
…distraction
…__________________ (yours)

Maybe today you know you are depressed–not just a little down. Is there anything you need to let go of? Right now, take it to God. Lay it down.  Just let it go, sweet friend. Loosen your grip upon the very thing that has kept you in bondage. Empty your hands. Empty your hands so you will be free to grasp onto all that Jesus has died to give you.

God wants for you to have LIFE. Jesus called it life more abundant. Are you there? Are you living the life Jesus died to give you? Is it abundant? Lavish?

Or depressed? Down? SICK-AND-TIRED? Weary? Desperate for a change?

Today can be that day you have longed for. Sure, you might look around you in the natural and things would look the same. But, want to get a view from beyond your circumstances? Want to get a vision that gives you hope? Want to see what God sees? Your good news today is that things won’t always be like they are. You can be healed! You can break free! You can get a new beginning! You can beat depression.

So, what can you do TODAY? What is God telling you to do? Your journey from the pit begins one step at a time, hearing which step God wants you to take each step of the way. What is your first step?

Time for that first step, sweet friend. Step!

–> Go on a Prayer Walk—regularly! Praise and worship the Lord. Pour out your heart. Talk to Jesus the whole way! Listen to His sweet “conversation” with you. Be refreshed!

–> Use a Daily “To-Do” List to operate from. List your TOP FIVE things each day the night before. Go back over each morning during your Quiet Time and pray about your day before you. Take it all to God and lay it before Him. Keep in your own “Brain-in-a-Binder” so you can rest your mind. Go over your list as you throughout the day to keep a tab on how you are doing (also so you will not chase rabbits). Watch how much more peaceful each day will be.

–> Turn on Praise Music—LOUD! Got an iPod? I call mine my “stress-buster.” I LOVE turning it on while I clean or while I work on my daily chores. Not only does it make the work much more fun and easy, but I also find myself taking the Lord into every aspect of my day. Priceless!

–> Begin a new hobby. Set aside time to pursue your hobby. Now is a great time to grab your camera and take pictures of the beauty outside…or sunsets! How about Scrapbooking? How about baking? Or…what was on your mind immediately? Learn it! Decide now to learn something new each and every day! It is GOOD for you!

–> Organize ONE thing each day. Make a list of all you want to see done. Keep the list so that you can add to it as you find other needs. As you work through it, mark off what IS being done. This will show you how much you ARE doing. Continue to work on one thing per day. The difference will not take long!

–> Do ONE thing each day JUST FOR YOU! Yep! You read right! How long has it been since you have done ANYTHING for you? There is one common denominator in the lives of many who are totally stressed out—they RARELY do anything for themselves. For real! You are created with a need for a daily quiet time…with a need to be nurtured, encouraged, inspired…with a need for something to look forward to. YOU need something special just for you each day even if it is your morning coffee in a quiet place! What are you doing? What fills your cup? Are you operating from a very dry, parched vessel? Do just ONE thing today just for you. Then, do just ONE thing tomorrow just for you. Just a little thing. Maybe spending 5 minutes reading from your Bible. Maybe adding bubbles to your bath water. Maybe going for a quick 15 minute walk. Maybe taking your children’s lessons outside just to bask in the sun for a few minutes while they work through their math lessons. Maybe join Curves or a local fitness gym. Maybe get a bottle of bubbles and go outside to play! Do SOMETHING each day just for you! See the stress levels decrease while life becomes so much more fun.

–> Purpose to laugh more and more each day! I read a quote a few years ago in a devotional by Dennis and Barbara Rainey. It has become one of my personal life goals. In fact, laughter is ONE thing that we can do to de-stress every day. Here it is

“Laughter is the medicine intended to cure the disease of self-importance. It’s hard to puff yourself up to weather balloon size if you can deflate yourself with a good prick of self-directed humor. How many laughs are you having–some at your own expense? Have you, as a couple, claimed the promise, “He will yet fill your mouth with laughter, and your lips with shouting.” (Job 8:21) Before the wedding ceremony, many couples need to have a bold objective for their first year of marriage: Over the next year, we will be found guilty of having too much fun rather than too little fun. That is not a bad objective for any year of marriage.”

So, what about you? Will you laugh more today than yesterday? Tomorrow than to day? Purpose to laugh more and more…the stress will run away!

–> Declutter! Don Aslett, famous organizing expert, says that 80% of what we own, we don’t even use. It is only clutter. I completely agree! In fact, I step out on a limb and make a completely un-researched assumption, but I would also imagine that 80% of what is on our schedule is clutter as well. We are sooo bogged down in clutter! Clutter can never be organized. Clutter can never be managed. It simply must be exterminated from our lives. So, why not de-stress a bit by getting rid of the “stuff” in your life. Stuff has a tendency to bring unneeded stress right along with it. Go ahead—get rid of it! Simplify! Simplify the clutter in your schedule. Throw away that stuff in the house. Copy quotes from those magazines and get rid of that bulky mess—journals are more precious than that clutter anyway! Jot down ideas in your journal. Get rid of those old clothes—you know that if you lose weight you will want NEW clothes anyway! (HOOT!) Over-run by cookbooks? Begin a “girl-time” to copy those that you love or those that you want to try into a special cookbook of your own. Sell or donate the rest. You very own cookbooks will be more helpful and way more special anyway. So, get busy getting rid of that clutter. Talk about instant de-stressing!

–> Get on your pj’s…cuddle up…watch old movies or a comedian. Pull out the chocolate…popcorn…old fluffy quilts. Make a sweet memory just “jelling” out with your precious family.

–> Read a book. It is amazing the power in a great book! Pull out a book with your little ones—something neat like Winnie the Pooh, Make Way for Ducklings, Dr. Seuss. Or…dig into a classic like The Hiding Place, The Little Preacher, Clean Your Boots, Sir, etc. Or read an old biography about someone neat. See if a family read aloud doesn’t breathe life into your home. BUT! That is not ALL! How long has it been since YOU have read a book JUST FOR YOU??? Grab something inspirational…something helpful…or something fun. OR ALL THREE! Just 10 minutes in a book will relieve some of that stress that can wipe you out!

–> Simplify! Simplify everything! Simplify stuff (yep, I said that again!)…commitments…curriculum…housework…meals. Completely simplify! No one will remember later all of those hours you spent on the stuff. They will remember your spirit.

Off my soapbox! hehe!

We were going through our daily study yesterday when something grabbed me away from the study–I have an inclination towards this with ANY study that I pursue! Of course, this one is GOOD! So good that I just wanted to share it with you. I think you will love it!

I am not sure how many of you really “connect” with Abraham in his story throughout Genesis. I guess that besides Jesus, he was the first person in the Scripture that I really “connected with.” His life seemed to parallel the life that Harold and I were required to walk in our life journey. I found Abraham to be a mentor from the very beginning. Everything about his life story ministers to me in the various aspects of my life journey.

One thing that hit me fresh as we were studying yesterday was that Abraham WENT THE DISTANCE!

Soak that in.

Abraham WENT THE DISTANCE…

Did you get that? He was called to leave his home, his homeland, his family to go to a place. Yep, a place that he was not even told about at the beginning.

Just leave and go to–A PLACE!

Yet, he went the distance!

Just think about how tough that was… Really put yourself in his position. Picture it in your mind.

He was called out of a culture that was much like our culture. He lived in a bustling city with all of the comforts of city living. He came from a large, “connected,” and very close-knit family.

So, why did God call him away. Why did God call him to leave it all and go the distance?  Well, beloved, Abraham was much like all of us. Living in the city was nice, but the lifestyle had become increasingly pagan. Being a part of a large family certainly had its perks, but it also had its pressures and drawbacks–especially in the light of the family being known for their polytheistic beliefs. The Bible seems to indicate that Abraham had something different about him than the rest of his family. Maybe he didn’t quite fit into the social scene because of the blatant immorality that was all around him. Maybe he struggled with his family background, thinking that there must be another way to live and wanting to get back to God’s perfect design for the godly home. We are not quite sure how it all really looked in his life there in Ur. But, one thing that we do see is that God saw something special in him. Something that He could work with. Something worth saving. Something that HE knew could go the distance.

I love the beginning of the story of Abraham. I SO relate!  In fact, it seemed that every time our church would begin a series on the life of Abraham, we would be moving or about to move at the time–hummm… (I think we are ok on this one this time–although God sure is asking me to get MOVING spiritually!)

My first time encountering Abraham was just after Harold and I married. We really needed to know what God wanted for us to do about college. Harold had several great options, but the very best option appeared to be in North Alabama. We were from South Mississippi. All of our family and friends were from there. We knew EVERYBODY…and of course, being from a small town, everybody knew us!   For us to move away and “GO” to this unknown place, we would have to leave all that was precious and all that was dear to us. We were going to have to risk breaking our parent’s hearts to move away to the place that God was leading us. It was so hard to step out there, leaving all that was familiar for a place that God would show us. Can you see how much we had in common with Abraham?

Oh, that is not all. God was up to more than we could have ever imagined! Not only was He calling us away “physically” for the college years, but we knew deep-down that He was also calling us to a “spiritual place” that we had never known. It was a place that our parents had never gone. It was a place where our family could not go with us or for us. We were to step up and go the distance to a place that was completely out of our comfort zone. A place where God would show us…

Well, we did it. We were a bit better off than Abraham. We could have all of our same comforts–thank God for air conditioners and cars to move!! He did not ONCE require that we eat worms (Yep! I was one of those children that read WAY TOO MANY missionary biographies–I seriously feared that following God would result in having to live in Africa as a missionary, eating worms and crickets (MISSIONARIES SHOULD NOT COME HOME AND GIVE SAMPLES OF FRIED YUCKIES!!!)–made me shy away from surrender! hehe!). Nope! Not one worm.  But, there was a cost that was rather hard. The holidays were desperately lonely, especially in the light of our famly traditions. The special memories with the children were no longer shared with the family. We were completely unknown (those in the south will TOTALLY get this!) after years of just saying our name and EVERYONE knew who we were! It may have seemed as though we moved only 300 miles away, but there was nothing familiar around us. It cost us to go the distance!

Not only did it COST…but it also paid off!  This is yet another parallel with Abraham! As we stepped out there to go wherever He wanted to send us, God blessed us SO richly! Not only did Harold get a great education, but he also got a great start in his career field. Our family was established strongly, apart from some of the distractions that can come from building on those old foundations from previous generations. Our unknown became our life that would not trade for anything in the world! Those tough times were completely outweighed by the blessings that came to us. That simple step was the first beginning toward God’s “promise” for our family–for US! It was the first step toward the life that God had in store for us.  It was worth going the distance!

So, what about you? Has God been calling lately? Is it time to “leave the place” where you have been for a while? It is time for you to “leave” something? It is time to go to the “place” that God wants to show you?

OH! DO IT! I can make a solid 100% guarantee on behalf of our Heavenly Father! Sound strong? Sound presumptious? Oh, it is guaranteed! If you will step out there and do exactly what He asks of you, He will never leave you or forsake you. He will show you the way each step along the way. He will take to you a place of promise! You can then have ALL that Christ died to give you! Ready?

Go the distance!