Actually this is part of my heartbeat here on the site and through all that I do. My heart goes out to you! I have been right where you are!

Last year was the first year that I actually DID work out. It changed me forever. Up until then, I did not see the value. In fact, I had bought the lie that it was selfish or “ungodly” to take care of yourself. In turn, I did not bring it into my day. Now, I will never be the same again.

Post-partum depression is really tough. I went through PPD after Matthew was born. I am so sorry that you have gone through such a tough time. I wish I was there! Of course, you are HERE! So, I am honored that I can be here alongside of you on this journey. You are not alone now!

Depression can come from so many things. Maybe it is the hormones. Maybe it is personal or relational conflict. Maybe it is a disappointment. Maybe it is an unmet expectation. Maybe it is a warning sign that something inside needs to be handled and dealt with. Maybe it is time to let go of something that is holding you back from the life that Christ came to give you.

I would lean toward the fact that because the meds did not work, it is is probably because there was a need to battle spiritually on the battlefield of your mind. Especially since your answer was FOCUS! WOW! That is good! Many doctors are quick to prescribe medication when depression can be very, very complex. For the large majority, the real need is mental or spiritual. Of course, I believe that depression can come from any inbalance–spiritually, mentally, or physically. That goes beyond the expertise of many doctors so they miss the real answers very often.

If it helps any, from my research, you may have some very good news! A good walk with the kids each day would be a great option right now in your pregnancy. I am not a physical trainer, but the past two months I have been nursing two injuries and battling a horrible cold. I have been very disappointed that I could not get my regular workouts done–I workout with a pretty hard-core intensity. There was a temptation to think that what I *WAS* able to do was NOT ENOUGH. Yet, it was really, really good for me.

A good daily walk is incredibly good for you. I think that it would be good for you at this time in your pregnancy. In fact, I really think that it would be the very best for you right now.

Sure, it is not as intense as you prefer for it to be, but you are doing more than just working out–you are also creating sweet memories with your children. Don’t underestimate how very, very important that is. Your children need a healthy mama. Healthy is not just physical. It is spiritual, mental, and physical.

So, get out there with the little ones for daily walks. This is a precious time of your life. When you get out there with them, you are taking care of yourself physically, mentally, and spiritually. Just SEE THAT. Give yourself permission to enjoy your little ones and make this time FUN! Sure, it may not be as intense or as focused as time in a gym or time working out full-force, but embrace it. You ARE keeping in shape. Plus, look at them scampering along–praise God for the blessings that you have. Notice all of the little things that they are doing each day. Soak in the treasures of motherhood. Yep! This could be the very thing that will help you to BE ALL THERE at this season. It sure goes by too quick. A daily walk with your children can make pull you away from the mediocre and help you to embrace this season fully. In the meantime, it will minister to your heart. Soak it up. Enjoy it!

I totally understand the struggle for time in the Word. One thing that I do for myself each day is plug into great teaching and worship on my iPhone. I have great music loaded, plus great podcasts and audios loaded that help me to dig into the Word and worship while I am doing my chores or going along the way. I know that it is harder when you have little ones, but how about setting aside time while they nap to learn something new each day?

One thing that I am wondering as I read your post–Are you past the depression or is it still lingering on? If it is lingering on, it may help to go to a doctor and let them know how serious it is. I avoided going to a doctor for a long time. I tried to be SUPER MOM. I wanted to keep moving on. I thought that if I kept on going, it would all be ok. It wasn’t. The pit just kept getting deeper and deeper. God brought me to a place where I would finally admit it and let HIM and others around me help.

First thing, He made me admit it. Not just to him, but to my husband and children and to my doctor. That was a pivotal point in my journey. Trust me, my husband, kids, and God knew VERY WELL that I was not ok. My doctor told me that he didn’t know–but, he DID think that I should be down and out because he saw all that had been hitting me for a long, long time. His view was that most people “go down” into the pit way sooner. That comforted me in a weird way!

For the first year, the doctor prescribed CELEXA. It was just perfect for me. It made a huge difference. At the same time, I slowed down and took everything to God for HIM to clean it up and show me what to do. I was SO tired and weary. Doing it on my own had brought on so much trouble. It was past time to let God loose to clean up the mess and help me get back on track.

During that year, God was able to show me some areas of my life that were just pushing me past my own limitations. I was not sleeping or resting like I should. That was first to change. I began taking a daily nap and going to bed earlier. I also was not eating well. I am STILL working on this one! I had gained weight and THOUGHT that if I did not eat, then I would lose weight. The opposite happened. God is still re-educating me and helping me break from those tendencies. Also, I had to learn how to take every thought captive and test every single thought that came through my mind to see if it was really TRUTH or REALITY. Satan had built a stronghold of wrong thinking that was keeping me depressed. I had to let go of all of that thinking so I could really let God loose to do what He wanted to do for me. That year was pivotal. At the end of the year, God healed me completely from depression–not from the temptations to go back there, but from the sickness. Since then, He has been there teaching me all along the way and bringing me to place where I am getting fit and healthy in spirit, soul, and body.

If depression is still chasing you around, I cannot suggest any more highly that you get some help. Admit it. Attack depression as if your life depended upon it–it does! Don’t let the enemy beat you down. Today is the day to come out of the enemy’s camp and run free! And, again, you are not alone! I will be there all along the way!

Yes! I will definitely get busy posting more help. Thanks for letting me know what you REALLY NEED. I will do it beloved!

Take good care!

Love ya!
Cindy

However, I am finding it much harder to exercise as my pgy progresses.
Going for a walk with the kids does not work – it needs to be proper strength training+cardio.

As for my Bible reading – it’s been years since i’ve done it properly. i have tried many times but during my depression i doubted every word of Scripture even though i prayed and prayed to God for help.
I pray throughout the day but nurturing my faith is a struggle.

Today I especially feel despondent – please post those articles!

I completely agree! It is so hard for moms to carve out that time. For me, I think it was a mixture of actually BEING so busy that by the time I COULD grab time for me, I was collapsing in exhaustion! Now, looking back. I think that I would have had more energy and been a better mom if I had put first-things-first–took better care of me first thing each day!

Another problem was, just what I shared in this article, I struggled with what OTHERS told me about “godliness” and bought the lie that taking care of myself was an EXTRA and even downright selfish. This one lie took me down the path toward total exhaustion and depression. I just do not want to see ANYONE else go down that path. That is EXACTLY what the enemy wants!

Diane, I do have some workshops that would be a great help. I will work on some more articles along this line. All you have to do is let me know when you would like to see help on certain topics. That helps me to have fresh ideas that REALLY help you!

Oh! One more thing! I have a new blog that is focused on “Getting Fit and Healthy.” You can find it at: http://www.CindyRushton.com/getfit I have some new audios that are being posted at this time. I hope to have more info there as we go through the year. I think you will LOVE it!

Have a super day sweet friends! Keep posting!

Love,
Cindy

Anyways, right on. I so needed to hear this. Every time I see that article I cringe . I’ve also struggled from depression and exhaustion as a young mother (okay, I’m still young). But it’s only this past little while that I’ve realized that I NEED to exercise, I NEED to do things by myself, I NEED to be faithful with my Bible readings. Because if I don’t, I’m not helping anyone!

Still, when I see that article I feel a twinge of guilt…”Am I a bad Mom?” So thanks for this!