Hello Sweet Friends!
How is your Saturday going? It is STUNNING here in North Alabama. Elisabeth and I got away for a breakfast out this morning. Matthew called to let me know that he had finished his 10K first place in his age division. And, my hubby just called to let me know how well he did shooting with his buddies today. Now, I am covered up with napping puppies and snagging a few moments on the computer. I like it! (more…)
Yesterday, we welcomed our precious Joshua Edwin Rushton into the world!
As I looked at him for the first time I finally GOT that verse in Proverbs 17:6:
“Children’s children are a crown to the aged.” (Proverbs 17:6)
We can have everything in the world–all of the stuff, all of the accomplishments, all of the possessions–everything. Yet, when the music fades and all is stripped away, only a few things really matter.
I have lived a life that has been sooo blessed. God has blessed me with so many amazing blessings. I cannot think that the cost for those blessings has been a big sacrifice for me when God has even made that EASY! 🙂 All He has required is that I obey Him and offer my life as a daily sacrifice, doing what HE asks. How hard is that? Especially, when I look at the abundant and lavish blessings that just chase me down.
Yes. I have been blessed in so many areas of my life:
1. Yes, this year we celebrate 25 years of marriage.
2. Yes, I have two amazing children here on earth and 7 in heaven. I could not be MORE blessed by their lives. Every moment of being a mom has been a treasure.
3. Yes, I have been blessed by success. I have written over 100 books, taught all around the country, ran a wonderful business (well, how hard is that when your business is all about connecting with wonderful FRIENDS???), and achieved almost everything I have ever set out to achieve.
We have been blessed in
…relationships
…provision
…success
…and anything we could ever want.
Yesterday, I saw the realization of my “crown.” One that I will carry all of the way into eternity. I am overcome by the beauty of legacy!
I know that I have taught for years about how vital it is for us to KNOW that we are building a HOME and that home is our legacy. I THOUGHT I had GOT IT through the years, but as I held my precious Joshua, my first GRANDchild, I realized it in a deeper level.
Everything is about our legacy! EVERYTHING! E-V-E-R-Y-T-H-I-N-G!
Our legacy is the only earthly treasure that we can carry with us into eternity. It is ETERNAL. Soak that in, dear friend!
Yes, we can go back into Scripture and see that every woman has a legacy. It is what summed up their lives. It is what passed down into the next generation and the next and the next and the next…all the way to us.
It is the ONE THING that was accomplished by their lives. Good or bad, every one of us passes on a legacy that goes on through generations that we may not see and into parts of their lives and all of the lives that they touch. It goes on into eternity–forever and forever.
I am sure that after I die, people will forget the words that I wrote. In fact, it cracks me up when people already forget the things that God gave me to write first–guess we all need to eat “humble-pie” from time to time. 🙂
I already know that when I look back over my life and all that I do and accomplish that the things that I DO have a tendency to look like a beach full of sand–each “to-do” as distinquishable as a grain of sand and all of the “to-do’s” piling up like a beach full of sand. Funny thing, I have a tendency to LOVE those things to do and pour myself into my precious “to-do’s” like a little child intent on building a sand-castle. I KNOW that all of those to-do’s can matter in life, but I also know that there is nothing like the waves rolling in and quickly washing away those “sand-castles.” Again, nothing is quite like seeing how everything is but a vapor. Everything just goes back into the everyday-ness of life.
But, my legacy lives on!
I don’t know if words are sufficient today. I hope that I am making sense to you guys. I LOVE MY LIFE. I am really picky about the things that I DO. I know that this life comes by only once. I don’t want to waste even ONE MOMENT doing something that is not going to count, much less something that is not right. I know that I will not even be RIGHT HERE again. I want to live each moment to the fullest and make my Abba Papa proud of me. I want to bring Him glory and honor. But, this is even MORE….
It is LEGACY!
We are here for so much more than we can ever imagine. OUR LIVES COUNT!
Soak that in…
Every choice that we make affects more than just ourselves or those that we see. There are multitudes coming behind us that NEED for us to be ALL THERE today, making every moment count.
As I look into the sweet face of our little Joshua, I can already see how important everything HAS been. As he looks at me, I feel the immense call rising up yet again–Cindy, BUILD YOUR LEGACY!
I am re-committed. Will you join me dear friends? Let’s build a legacy–a godly legacy!
Need MORE Help?
If you need more help, don’t miss any of Cindy Rushton’s LIVE workshops that she will be teaching on these topics. She is scheduled to speak for many conventions, conferences, retreats, and Bible Studies. If you want for her to come to your area, message here today at CindyRushton@Gmail.com
Hello Sweet Friend!
What does your calendar look like? Is it just too busy? Want to change things, but have no idea what COULD go? Is it time to prune?
There is something about spring that requires that we cut out the extras and gear up the things that really matter. If we don’t, there are ramifications. We get…
Tired
Weary
Stressed out
Pushed to our limits
Pulled in too many directions
Edgy
Snippy
Irritable
OK…angry and downright bitter.
Relate?
It is time to spring clean our commitments. It is time to look at all that we have on our calendar and really evaluate:
Is it necessary?
Is it essential?
Is it stressing us out?
Is it pushing and pulling?
Is it worth it?
Is it the very best…or just another GOOD thing?
It is far too easy to just get in our ruts and let things go. You know the end result–a year that is a bit disappointing. A year filled with regrets. A year that doesn’t seem to count.
My sweet friend, 2010 is a year that we get a new beginning. TODAY is a new beginning. Why not join me “spring cleaning” yet another area of our lives this week–our commitments. Let’s roll up our sleeves and dig into the messies. Let’s pull everything out and really look at all of our commitments. Let’s evaluate, prune, organize, clean out and clean up. We can do it together. Then, we can reach for a year that really counts!
Ready? Let’s dig in…
Too Much In A Day…
Yep! This is one of my greatest struggles. I am one of those people who hopelessly plan too much into my life. I want to DO IT ALL! And, the sad thing is that I try to! Recently, one of my personal studies has been (don’t laugh!), “How to Manage My Time.” Why? Well, because I want to eliminate any possible hindrance so I can do MORE!! Hehe! I know motives may not necessarily be great here. Actually, they may signal a blaring warning that tells you that this is one area that I personally struggle with RIGHT NOW. True, but I have to share some of what I am finding (and applying) in my study. Who knows? It may help you to tame your schedule so you can busy doing the things that God has called you to do too!
For one thing, it really helps to sit down and really look at your day. What DOES get done in a typical day? I have found that I do get a lot done in a day. I will never be accused of being idle. In fact, I am writing this article while my husband runs errands (see the next section of this article about that!). I really do seize every moment I can. But, at the end of most days, I still have the same complaint, “I need MORE hours in my day!”
We are only alotted 24 hours a day. One prayer request that we can be sure WON’T be answered is the request for 85 hours in a day! Why? Because it would still not be enough for people like me! So, how do we make more hours in our day?
Make that list of what IS being done in a day. Make another list of what you would REALLY like to see included that you are not getting around to. See if what you are doing and if what you would like to do fits into what God has placed on your heart as your priorities. Make sure that they help you to reach toward the “mark.” For me, when we began homeschooling I struggled for a while with distractions and hindrances that are so common in a busy home. After, well, a whole year (I am very slow on some things!) the Lord showed me the value in looking over my typical day to see how I could fit in the things that were most important and those little things that are always going to pop up. I found that there were categories that most everything could fit into: Quiet Times, Chores, Table Time, Family Time, Productive Free Time, Ministry/Business, and Family Read Alouds. Actually this is the basic order for my day every day (well, now the kids are both graduated and out of the nest–so that time is now set aside for getting fit/healthy and even more business/ministry). It is possible at home. It is possible on the road. It is possible when we have company. It is possible when things go a bit hay-wire! These are the priorities for the day, but there are still things even with ME that never seem to get done unless they are part of the schedule for the day.
For example, this past summer, my doctor prescribed that I go to the Wellness Center for exercise daily. I had wanted more time to actually get around to exercising. But, it just seemed that if I had another 55 hours in my day that then I could have time to devote to exercise! Instead of asking for the impossible while neglecting such an important area of my life, I opted to fit this time into my daily schedule FIRST each day. It is amazing how much better everything else is running. Not only do I feel better, but I also have more energy and focus. Plus, my conscience is clear instead of being plagued with guilt, condemnation, and frustration. Yes. Make your list and see what you are doing AND not doing.
Making a List, Checking it Twice (or FIFTEEN TIMES!!)…
I made my list. Then, it was easier to see the holes in my life that were not being filled. Sure, I was accomplishing a lot with my children, our ministry, and even my marriage relationship. But, there were still glaring holes beaming out at me and plaguing me with guilt and condemnation! Yes, I wanted to exercise. I have stacks of wonderful audio tapes that I would love to hear. I want more time to sit back and relax, even if it is occasionally! I wanted more time to make memories with the children. Of course, I also wanted to be more productive. Those are the things that seem to give me the “feeling” that I am not accomplishing as much in my day as I really wanted. Of course, I was accomplishing the “work” in each day. On many days that was ALL that was accomplished. No wonder there was a feeling of frustration! We are geared to do more than just work day-in-day-out. So, what to do?
Look At Your Typical Day…
First, I had to take an honest look at all those things that were included in a typical day. Many were right down the line with the vision God has placed in my heart. Yet, there were still things that God had placed on my heart that were not ever making it into my days. Plus, there were other things that were very questionable. I had to look at every single thing in my day to really evaluate them all…
–> Were there things that could be combined so I could accomplish more tasks at one time?
–> Were there things that can be delegated to others so I could have more time for things that only I could do?
–> Were there things that simply needed to go? Were they past their season? Did they need to be eliminated because they were really not that essential to what we were about?
I am not saying that I was doing anything bad. I don’t think that is how the enemy typically hits some of us. Think about it. If you were given a temptation to do something downright wrong, would it really be a temptation to you? The way that the enemy prefers to hit gals like you and me is through the GOOD THINGS. You know–those things that no one else will or can do at church. Those little things that have “sweet” motives. Those little things that don’t look too hard, but end up zapping us. You know them. Just evaluating them has helped me sooo much. Everything that we do cost us in our two greatest commodities:
TIME
ENERGY
We have to make sure that what we are doing really matters. If we don’t, we will just stay busy, busy, busy. We will stay on the go. At the end, whether it is this year or at the end of our lives, we will look back with regrets.
I don’t want that. I know that today it is tough to let go of “our babies” whether they are activities or positions or systems that we have had in place for years or methods we have been using successfully or commitments. However, it is sooo worth it. Let’s evaluate every single thing we do, every single thing on our calendars and be ready to let go of anything that hinders or distracts us. It is sooo worth the hard work.
Combine Tasks…
Yep! This may help you too. See if there can be things that can be combined. For me, exercise and listening to those teaching tapes get two things done. Neither fit into my schedule before because I felt that exercise was just frivolous (looking at this body OBVIOUSLY shows I was not right!). Listening to my teaching tapes seemed to always not fit in—I had to concentrate when I write or answer email, my family did not really appreciate hearing my tapes, and there was really no time other than that! However, fitting them together is the perfect answer! That 30 minutes a day is life-giving. It makes the other 23 hours and 30 minutes a whole lot better!
There were many other adjustments and changes. Not too easy, but definitely helpful! Things like cooking in the crockpot overnight so we are at home while it is cooking, but not having to stand over a stove during the day…going through the mail as we walk back from the mailbox and dumping the junk-mail into the trash before we walk in the house (our can is right outside the door!) rather than do a big clean-out during the year… Doing more things at one time really helps to use the time I have to the fullest!
Delegate! OUCH!
Delegate! Yep! Talk about another toughie for me! I have worked on this one year-after-year for two decades. I suspect that this one will always need a conscientious effort by me. It is too easy for me to jump in and try to do it all.
The first time I ever delegated stands out in my mind as a turning point for me. My children were 7 and 4 at the time. We were living in our camper in Selma, AL while Harold was in the State Trooper Academy there. Living in the camper was probably one of my most life-changing experiences because I learned how much of my life at that time was “fluff” and wasted. Living in the camper forced me to only have my most essential belongings with me. (still have not unpacked many of the boxes we had stored away—now way over 15 years ago!!!) We made more memories than ever. Each day we had plenty of time for me to just mother, keep my home, homeschool, and even play games at the end of the day! Life was simple. Homemaking was easy. I made easy meals. Cleanup of the whole camper was usually 5-10 minutes or at most 25 minutes (big change from my 10-12 hour cleaning days before!)! The hardest part was the small space and taking laundry OUT to the laundrymat every few days. The good part was that in Selma the laundrymat was AT THE POOL! The children could play and I could enjoy watching over them while I read, did laundry AND tanned! (had the best tan and read more that 6 months than ever in my life!) However, in the midst of this EASIER life there were STILL struggles!
How could it be? Well, I could clean up, but while I was cleaning my children were idle—arguing (yep, these PERFECT children were acting like other children!), messing up the other side of the room (EEK!), and dirtying up their clothes (EVERY DAY!).
One day in particular, a Monday (Could I find a better word to give you a “picture” of this scene?) to be completely accurate, I had so much pressing in that day. I was standing at my 1 ft X 1ft X 4inch deep sink (it still felt like Mt. Everest!) full of dishes. The children were behind me just finishing their breakfast. And, they had the audacity to begin fussing over WHO could watch their movie (and WE homeschool!). The quarreling was getting ON MY NERVES—the really touchy ones! There I was…washing dishes…the laundry was there needing for me to fold it…the toilets needed cleaning…we needed to begin our lessons for the day…my husband was gone for another week at the academy, leaving me with my PERFECT little morons, I mean children, lambs, beloved little ones…and here they were ARGUING! I snapped. I admit it! I simply snapped. I told them, actually screamed at them, to stop arguing and just fold those clothes if they had that much energy. Still washing my dishes…silence permeated the room for several minutes until giggly-giggles took over. I turned around to find that almost ALL of the laundry was folded and they were LIKING IT! Tears filled my eyes. The Lord spoke to my heart. I did not have to do it all myself! MY children COULD help me!
Oh yea! And so can your children! What CAN be delegated? Anything! Everything, well, there are a few things that only YOU can do. Find them and delegate the rest! Oh, it may not immediately be the same standard that you do things yourself, but who looks in the dresser anyway? (only sick people we should never try to please, if you ask me!) Plus, think of how valuable it is for children to learn from an early age to pitch in and be a “part” of the family. So, take a look at your list of things that YOU are doing each day. Look at what can be delegated. Then, delegate to your little ones!
Eliminate!!
Finally, go back to your trusty list. What can be eliminated? This is where you may experience anxiety. But, really look at all you do in a day. Are those things really important? Can they be done in another way that can give you more time? Let me take you home with me again. I love to have healthy, homemade meals. But, reality says that if I want to save time, this was one of those areas that really could be simplified down so much that much of the time spent in the kitchen on a daily basis could actually be eliminated. Gasping? Well, so did I–at first!
I took an honest look at our meals. We could eliminate so much that I could gain HOURS each week. How? Well, I decided to do more bulk cooking, buy more “ready-made” meals, like Lasagna from Sam’s, Baked Chicken (heat and serve) from Sam’s, Pizza (yep, and my children LOVE it!), and even Heavenly Ham! Yep, Heavenly Ham (should be getting a percentage here, huh?). What may seem like an extravagance is really a great way to save precious TIME and have great meals whether using the Ham as the meat for a meal or as sandwich meat. One big ham lasts our family for several weeks. In addition to tasting great and saving me time cooking and preparing the ham, we also cut at least an hour of cooking each day for lunch for those two weeks. All I have to do is add vegetables (we have a freezer full of vegetables from the garden that just have to be de-frosted and warmed!) and bread! A typical meal can come together in 15-30 minutes! We can also use food like the Heavenly Ham for lunch. We just make sandwiches and either eat just the sandwich or have a sandwich and homemade soup, that also can be made in a big pot! Easy. Saves time for other more important things in my schedule—like enjoying the family I am feeding!!
Now, you may not feel that cooking can be eliminated in your daily schedule. Each of our families are so very different. This is where only God can help you to decide what can be combined, delegated, eliminated OR done by you each day! Hear HIM and He is guaranteed not to fail you!
Too Much Going…
Hummm….well, here we get a little personal, huh? This is an area that God RESTRICTED for me. It was just not as clear-cut as DO, COMBINE, DELEGATE, OR ELIMINATE. Instead, my “going” has to be decided each and every day during my daily time with God. Each instance must be thrown up on that altar for God to classify for us!
What about you? Do you struggle with all of the going? Does it get to be too much? What are we to do?
Beloved, first slow down! Watch out for too much going! Oh, it may not even be for “bad” stuff! It just keeps us from having what we really want! Think about it…
Is this a hindrance for you?
Let’s get a little more personal. Do you go so much (even for good things) that you sometimes find that you cannot truly enjoy your home? When was the last time you had TIME to leisurely relax and enjoy your home? For me, this is a constant struggle. A daily struggle! There are so many “to-do’s” that press in that I get too busy, going too many directions before I even know it!
Testing…
I have had a test for years that I periodically do to evaluate my lifestyle and schedule. I ask myself,
–> “Can I spend one entire week at home without feeling as though I am not getting to do all I need to do?” (Yep, I am squirming a bit here too!)
–> “Is my home supplied well enough that I can stay home without having to “run” to get more things that I “need” to cook, teach my children, manage my home?” (Gasp! EEK!)
–> “Is a quiet, peaceful homelife impossible because I am too busy going to activities?” (OUCH!)
–> “Are all those activities truly God’s will?” (Sniff, sniff!)
–> “Would all those same activities go on just as well without ME?” (Well, uh, how would I know if I am not there?)
–> “What CAN I eliminate to give us more time at home as a family?” (Ok…Ok!)
–> “Does my husband feel that all I am doing is essential? God’s will?” (Well, uh…)
It is amazing how much CAN GO! Just last week, Harold and I got a great big laugh when we both shared what had been on our hearts, at the same time! I had noticed that we were losing time with errands on almost a daily basis. Oh, and almost the SAME errands every single day! My reasons were simple, I wanted for to be a good steward of the money, not buying anything that could go to waste. But, as a result, our time was being wasted…gas going and coming was being wasted…I was not as prepared for each day as I could have been…and the atmosphere of our home was interrupted every day with “to-do’s.”
This is not the only area that gets out of control easy at our home. Our schedule is just as wild! I must manage our outside activities or very quickly we become THEIR servants!
I know what you are saying. I say the same thing, “Oh! But This is GOOD!” Yep!
We travel on a weekly basis throughout the whole year. Because of this, as we decided to travel this much, we had to eliminate many GOOD things from our schedule.
Naturally, I am just as much of a “clutter-bug” with our TIME as I am with books, papers, etc. Loosening my grip on those GOOD THINGS is so, SO hard! Yet, there is no way to truly do exactly what God has called us to do, except to prune! Oh, yea! That hard word!
Cutting back.
Slowing down.
Getting back to the core.
Keeping only what is bearing fruit, so all of the nutrients (energy) can go into bearing MORE fruit! Truly, the person was “right on” who said that if satan can’t get us to do WRONG things, then he will keep us busy doing a lot of GOOD things which ultimately hinder us from doing God’s VERY BEST. That person must have been JUST like me! What about you?
Too busy “going” to BUILD your home, to be ALL THERE, to do what really matters, to do what COUNTS?
Slow down.
Slow down to enjoy your home.
Slow down to make your home special, a fortress.
It is time to SPRING CLEAN those commitments!
But! How *DO* ya do it? ???
Have no idea how to even begin? Have no idea what you genuinely could let go? Is it just too confusing? Afraid you or your family will miss something?
–> Go to God with your schedule. Place all activities on the altar. Wait on Him. I promise that God will lead you, direct you and teach you. He will not leave you in the midst of confusion. He will come alongside of you and help you whether it is big or little choices that need to be made. Just take it all to Him and turn Him loose!
–> Share your heart with your husband. Let your husband set your schedule. Husbands really do have a gift for seeing through activities. They can see straight through all of the sugar-coating all the way to a vision for how it will really look in our homes and how it will feel as we live it out. Through the years, Harold has had a keen eye for things that we SHOULD “go for” and for the things that were going to be a trap and get us off track. It is not always easy for me to follow, but when I dare to listen and follow, I am amazed at how much better things go. Get your sweetheart’s TRUE insights before adding anything into your schedule. Also, lay everything out today before him. Ask him what needs to go, what needs to stay, what is missing. You will LOVE the results!
–> Look over all of the activities very carefully, evaluating them honestly. Do they work toward the call that God has for your family? Are they necessary? Do they compete for “down-time” that your family really needs to fellowship, rest, and develop a lifestyle of learning? Have you been in a rut, not getting things done, with no idea WHY? Let’s really look at everything with the “pruning sheers” in hand. Let’s be willing to let go of all of the good things so we can reach for the very best things, the things that COUNT!
–> Be on guard! Titus 2: 3-5 instructs the older women to teach the younger women several very important lessons. One in particular applies here– to be keepers of their homes. A keeper is a “guard” or “one entrusted to guard.” Godly women are called to be a guard over their homes. We must constantly guard our home. This is more than just a fun “spring cleaning” that we MIGHT want to do, rather it is essential that we come back to a place regularly where we check to see how we are doing, where we reinforce “the gates” and repair any breaches. We must constantly evaluate whether our homes are in conformity with the vision God has given us for our family. We must constantly check our “gardens” and uproot any weeds or overgrown plants that hinder the growth of our most precious “plants,” our children! We have to constantly make sure to have time with God, time with our husbands, time with our children, time within our homes, time to minister to those within our sphere of influence, and time left so we can take care of ourselves! We have to be ALL THERE ALL OF THE TIME! That means that this is not an extra–when-we-get-around-to-it option. This is an essential. We need to set aside time to make sure that everything we do really counts. We need to be on guard against those things that have a way of easing into our lives to our detriment.
Sweet friends, what does it look like? Are there things that need to go? Are there things that are very good, but they are keeping you from the very best? Today, roll up your sleeves and dare to spring clean. Dig in and really do that hard work. It is SO worth it! Choose those commitments that are the very best and let go of all of the rest–even the good stuff.
The Bible says that there are works set from the foundation of the world. There are thing that really count–and things that do not count. Be faithful in YOUR works!
Seek God’s wisdom for your commitments–EVEN your lifestyle and schedule. Don’t let the enemy distract you by what is “out there” somewhere else. Stick to the main thing–that thing that cannot be taken away from you.
Don’t feel guilty about letting great things go. Do ALL you can to preserve that home atmosphere from ALL distractions that are out there. Don’t get too busy to build your home for truly you have much to look forward to—just look at Proverbs 24: 3-4:
“Through skillful and godly wisdom is a house (a life, a home, a family) built, and by understanding it is established [on a sound and good foundation], and by knowledge shall its chambers [of every area] be filled with all precious and pleasant riches.” Proverbs 24: 3-4
Ah, yes! Build your home! As you do, you will move forward, making this year really count! Roll up those sleeves. Dig in and do the hard work. Let’s get busy spring cleaning our commitments!
This post was excerpted from this week’s Time for Tea Ezine. The weekly ezine is available for FREE by subscription. Don’t forget to sign up today so you don’t miss even ONE issue! Scroll up on this page and look on the right sidebar to sign up. See ya there!
Have you looked at the calendar? Do you know what Saturday was? Yep! The first day of spring! I am soooo ready for spring this year. It has been so damp, gloomy, cold this year. I am ready for some sunshine, fresh air, and nicer temperatures. Believe it or not, I am even ready to spring clean this year. So ready that I have already been spring cleaning EVERYTHING!
Want to join me? Super!
Over the next few weeks, we are going to look at several different areas of our lives that need to be “cleaned out” so we can have the best year ever. I really want for you to dig in and do the hard work WITH ME so we can spring clean our lives together.
What we will do is look at the need. Then, I will give you some action steps to help you get going. Good deal? Ok…
Let’s look at the first area that just might need a bit of “cleaning” out. Ready? If you want to print this out to read and apply, just download the PDF version here: DOWNLOAD BY PDF.
Ready to get busy spring cleaning? The first area is spring cleaning our day. Let’s dig in…
Spring Clean Your Day
Seem like a strange place to begin? Well, sometimes the real mess in our lives is caused by the one thing that gets into a rut and is so hard to SEE as the problem. I have missed this one over and over and over. Sometimes I have blamed my messies on my homeschool curriculum. Other times I have blamed it all on my husband (sorry, but I have). Other times I have blamed it on my children and their lack of….you name it: obedience, behavior, help, etc. Even since the kids have grown up, I have blamed it on my business. Looking everywhere but the most obvious: MY DAY.
If my DAY is a mess, it is funny how every other area of my life gets messy–my commitments, my home, my relationships, my business, ME. Funny thing, it doesn’t take much to get it together and keep it together. But, how?
1. Dust off that schedule! Nothing can help things to run more smoothly than taking time to get our daily schedule together. It gives us a framework to our day. It keeps things moving smoothly. When things get out of whack, there is usually one of two things that I need to do:
Get the extras back off my schedule.
Adjust to the new things in my life and work them into a spot in my schedule.
It is spring. How is your schedule? Does it need to be cleaned out? Have too many “extras” gotten into the schedule? Is it time to cut them out of your day? Or, are you in a new place? Is it time to readjust your schedule? Is it time to take a little time to get that “new thing” into your lifestyle so that it is not such a struggle each and every day? Why not roll up your sleeves and get to work dusting off that schedule. You will see your day shaping back up very quickly.
2. Make time for what really counts–what really matters to you. There is no reason to live even one more day just going through the motions like a hamster on a wheel. Let’s make this year really count! Let’s make time for what really counts. Let’s make time for what really matters. I know that we are four months into the year. I know that days fly by and it is easy to let time fly by just barely getting things done for each and every day. But, why don’t we clean out anything in our day that is holding us back from doing the things on our heart? Why don’t we make room for those things FIRST in our day? The other things may be clammering, squealing, and pitching fits to get our attention, but let’s commit to make THIS YEAR really count. Let’s be intentional about getting those things done first. Then, watch how our day changes. It will shape up and become a sweet history without regrets.
3. Balance it all. Many times it does not take anything big to get things out of balance. In fact, usually it only takes something small and insignificant to get things out of whack. Take some time to really look at your day. You may want to take a few days to journal each and everything that you are doing and how long it is taking. My journals ALWAYS point to the problems instantly. Look back over all that is getting done AND those things that are not getting done. Evaluate:
–> Are there things that are getting out of boundaries? My life is full of things that have a tendency to get out of their boundaries. We homeschooled our children from the time they were in pre-school until they graduated. Everything about homeschooling had a tendency to take longer than I planned. Actually, the best lesssons-those that I would not trade now for anything-took the longest. I could have homeschooled all day and all night and never got everything done that I really wanted. Same thing with business. I have had a home business for over 20 years. You would think that I could set my hours and stick to it. Yet, I have noticed that my business is as bad or worse than homeschooling about taking way more time than projected. Oh! And, that is not all! Even homemaking has a tendency to get out of boundaries. Any one area can demand so much that everything gets out of balance. I have to watch out! I have to work hard at setting limits and sticking to them. How about you? Is it time to simplify, clean out, organize, and systematize things so that it is easier to keep everything in its boundaries? Roll up your sleeve and dig-in! It will make a huge difference!
–> Are there things that need to go? I don’t know if you are like me, but I have always had a resistance to change. This can be good news if you depend upon me to be consistent and be a person of integrity. (SMILE) Of course, this one quality has gotten me and my life out of balance more times than I can recount. Ready for a true confession? I am so bad to hold onto things until I am simply NOT able to hold on any longer. I can see clearly that things would be easier or that things would be better yet there is something within me that struggles every single time with letting things go. Want the good news? Every single time that I have let go, every single time that I have unclasped my fingers from around those things, it has always been sooo much better! It has always been worth it. Everything has smoothed out. Every season we have to let things go if we are going to have room in our lives for new things. It is sooo worth it! Until we do, things just get messy. Things get bumpy. Things get stressful. Need to let things go? Today is a great day to pile it up and get rid of it.
That brings me to the final idea…
4. Get on track and make this year your best ever–day-by-day! You may have started this year with big intentions. Maybe you wanted to lose weight and get in shape. Maybe you wanted to pay off your debts. Maybe you wanted to get your home organized. Maybe you wanted to make time to remodel that room in your home. Maybe you wanted more time with your spouse or children. Maybe you wanted for this year to be that year that you read through the Bible. Well, what was your goal? What was your resolution? What would make your day a success? What would make this year really count?
When we look at the year, it is made of days and moments in those days. In order for our year to be a year that counts, we have to begin with each moment, getting it on track so that we have a collection of moments and days that really count. Why not go back to those resolutions and give them another look. I know it is not January. THIS is when you look at them. This is when we put them on our daily schedule. This is when we live them out. Let’s get on track and make this year the year when we DO IT! Deal? Get on track today. Make this year your very best year ever–day-by-day!
Ok…we are not done yet. We have much, much more to dig into. Don’t miss next week’s ezine!
Need MORE Help?
If you need more help, don’t miss any of Cindy Rushton’s LIVE workshops that she will be teaching on these topics. She is scheduled to speak for many conventions, conferences, retreats, and Bible Studies. If you want for her to come to your area, message here today at CindyRushton@Gmail.com
Reading the Bible and praying more is right at the top of Christian womens’ goals and resolutions lists, up there with getting organized and losing weight. Unfortunately, just like organizing and weight loss aspirations, our best plans and intentions to have daily devotions or quiet times tend to fizzle a few weeks into the year. What happens? We’re convinced of the value of spending time getting to know our God through His word. We’re convinced of the power of prayer in our lives and others’. How does something this important and desirable keep slipping through the cracks in our days?
One of the ways we unintentionally keep something from happening is making it too difficult or complicated. Do you admire a friend who is able to read her Bible an hour or two a day? Or a friend who studies Greek daily? A favorite author who writes about watching the sun rise as she prays over her day? All of these things may be good, but do they work for you at this point of your life? Maybe you have three small children running around and 1 – 2 hours of uninterrupted reading time just isn’t going to happen. Maybe you are anything but a morning person. In your mind is anything less than your “ideal” quiet time not worth doing? In other words, are you making it more difficult than it needs to be?
All you really need to have your quiet time are three things: A time, a place, and your “stuff”
– your Bible and anything else you’re planning to read. Place and “stuff” are pretty straightforward. You need a place to sit and read and something to read of course. Where we usually get messed up is time. We usually know “what” we want to do, it’s the “when” we have a problem with, as in the “when” just not happening!
Here is a common scenario. We hear that waking up early to have our quiet time is the best way to go so that’s what we shoot for. If you’re an “early riser” this can work great, but for the rest of us… Tell me if this sounds familiar: You wake up later than you planned (again) and you resolve to get on track and have your quiet time later that morning. Then “something” happens and you have to put it off until lunch. Lunchtime ends up being taken up with “something” else and you figure maybe in the afternoon you’ll catch a little time. Guess what… “something” keeps happening until you’re laying in bed wondering what happened to your quiet time.
So if you don’t get up early in the morning is all lost? Not at all! Look at your day and pick the best time that works for you. Don’t worry about your friend, your favorite author’s schedule, or what you’ve heard is “most spiritual.” What time of your day tends to be the least hectic and most likely to be somewhat quiet? The kids’ nap time? While dinner is in the oven? My best time is right before bedtime! It’s quiet, there’s nowhere I have to be, and everyone else is in bed too. Be creative! What’s important isn’t the time of day you pick, it’s that you pick a time that works best for your current schedule and that you guard it from invading “somethings”. The “best” time for your quiet time is the time you can realistically make it happen! You might have to experiment a bit to find the best time. Also, have your place picked out and your “stuff” where it needs to be so looking for your Bible and a pen doesn’t end up being a “something” that comes up!
So how long should your quiet time be? Again, look at what works for you. I’d love to have two hours a day but in this season of my life when I have four kids, one with special needs, two hours isn’t going to happen on a typical day. God knows your circumstances and responsibilities – He created your family! Do what you realistically can. You can probably get 20 – 30 minutes into your day. Some days you’ll have more time, some days you’ll have less. If you can’t find even 20 – 30 minutes, take a look at some other activities you find time for like checking e-mail, web surfing, Facebook, telephone calls, reading… We make time for these things without thinking twice about it. Not trying to be legalistic… just something to think about!
It’s not too late to get your prayer and Bible reading resolutions and goals back on track. Sit down and take a few moments to think about what the best time is for you and make a plan of attack!
Don’t you just LOVE Jennifer? I ADORE HER!
She is one of our speakers at our upcoming (in just a FEW WEEKS) Ultimate Women’s Expo! Don’t miss her! You will be fired, inspired, encouraged, and equipped to make THIS YEAR count!
Are you a “night owl” who needs more help making a consistent quiet times happen? Jennifer Schwilling’s new e-book Night Owl Devotions is all about thinking outside the box to make meaningful devotions a part of a busy mom’s life. You can visit her on-line at: http://www.MomsNoChaosZone.com or http://www.DaisyChainDailyCarnival.com
Reading the Bible and praying more is right at the top of Christian womens’ goals and resolutions lists, up there with getting organized and losing weight. Unfortunately, just like organizing and weight loss aspirations, our best plans and intentions to have daily devotions or quiet times tend to fizzle a few weeks into the year. What happens? We’re convinced of the value of spending time getting to know our God through His word. We’re convinced of the power of prayer in our lives and others’. How does something this important and desirable keep slipping through the cracks in our days?
One of the ways we unintentionally keep something from happening is making it too difficult or complicated. Do you admire a friend who is able to read her Bible an hour or two a day? Or a friend who studies Greek daily? A favorite author who writes about watching the sun rise as she prays over her day? All of these things may be good, but do they work for you at this point of your life? Maybe you have three small children running around and 1 – 2 hours of uninterrupted reading time just isn’t going to happen. Maybe you are anything but a morning person. In your mind is anything less than your “ideal” quiet time not worth doing? In other words, are you making it more difficult than it needs to be?
All you really need to have your quiet time are three things: A time, a place, and your “stuff”
– your Bible and anything else you’re planning to read. Place and “stuff” are pretty straightforward. You need a place to sit and read and something to read of course. Where we usually get messed up is time. We usually know “what” we want to do, it’s the “when” we have a problem with, as in the “when” just not happening!
Here is a common scenario. We hear that waking up early to have our quiet time is the best way to go so that’s what we shoot for. If you’re an “early riser” this can work great, but for the rest of us… Tell me if this sounds familiar: You wake up later than you planned (again) and you resolve to get on track and have your quiet time later that morning. Then “something” happens and you have to put it off until lunch. Lunchtime ends up being taken up with “something” else and you figure maybe in the afternoon you’ll catch a little time. Guess what… “something” keeps happening until you’re laying in bed wondering what happened to your quiet time.
So if you don’t get up early in the morning is all lost? Not at all! Look at your day and pick the best time that works for you. Don’t worry about your friend, your favorite author’s schedule, or what you’ve heard is “most spiritual.” What time of your day tends to be the least hectic and most likely to be somewhat quiet? The kids’ nap time? While dinner is in the oven? My best time is right before bedtime! It’s quiet, there’s nowhere I have to be, and everyone else is in bed too. Be creative! What’s important isn’t the time of day you pick, it’s that you pick a time that works best for your current schedule and that you guard it from invading “somethings”. The “best” time for your quiet time is the time you can realistically make it happen! You might have to experiment a bit to find the best time. Also, have your place picked out and your “stuff” where it needs to be so looking for your Bible and a pen doesn’t end up being a “something” that comes up!
So how long should your quiet time be? Again, look at what works for you. I’d love to have two hours a day but in this season of my life when I have four kids, one with special needs, two hours isn’t going to happen on a typical day. God knows your circumstances and responsibilities – He created your family! Do what you realistically can. You can probably get 20 – 30 minutes into your day. Some days you’ll have more time, some days you’ll have less. If you can’t find even 20 – 30 minutes, take a look at some other activities you find time for like checking e-mail, web surfing, Facebook, telephone calls, reading… We make time for these things without thinking twice about it. Not trying to be legalistic… just something to think about!
It’s not too late to get your prayer and Bible reading resolutions and goals back on track. Sit down and take a few moments to think about what the best time is for you and make a plan of attack!
Don’t you just LOVE Jennifer? I ADORE HER!
She is one of our speakers at our upcoming (in just a FEW WEEKS) Ultimate Women’s Expo! Don’t miss her! You will be fired, inspired, encouraged, and equipped to make THIS YEAR count!
Are you a “night owl” who needs more help making a consistent quiet times happen? Jennifer Schwilling’s new e-book Night Owl Devotions is all about thinking outside the box to make meaningful devotions a part of a busy mom’s life. You can visit her on-line at: http://www.MomsNoChaosZone.com or http://www.DaisyChainDailyCarnival.com
It was a normal day, just like so many others, but my life was changed. In fact, it was a conversation similar to so many throughout my life…just girl talk in the kitchen over meal preparation. Who would imagine that it would change my life and lead me toward my life call? Who would imagine that it would put together all of the pieces to my jumbled-up life?
Mamaw Alma Lee Rushton was my ex-husband’s grandmother. I remember the first day I met her. We had an instant bond. It was amazing.
When Mamaw spoke, she spoke vision… instruction… inspiration… and a deep passion for Godly womanhood. Her opinions meant so much to me. Her insight was always biblical. Her instruction was patient and kind. I clung to her words. They were steeped in a love for God, a love for family, and a deep love for me.
So, imagine the day that my life changed. We were busy in the kitchen preparing one of those good old summer meals. Family meals in our families meant that all of the family favorites were part of the menu. The funny thing, this day had ALL of the favorites. Looking back, the entire time was so special that it was beyond a regular day. This day would go down in our family history as pivotal. It changed my life and in turn changed our whole family.
Being a godly woman is so important. Sure, we are born to be women. But, godliness is a choice. The choices are made in little things and big things all along the way. Those things influence not just our own lives, but those around us, those we all touch, and those in generations yet to come. We are women with great influence. Our greatest influence cannot be planned. Our greatest influence will happen when we least expect it.
Going back to that special day…
The kitchen was bustling and yummy smelling. Mamaw was her usual sweet, rosy-cheeked, and upbeat self. I was a bit weary. We were back home in our home-town because his dad was having a triple by-pass. Mamaw was in deep prayer for her son, but you saw only her intense faith in God and not even one moment of fear, worry, or doubt. The kids were tickled to be running around Mamaw’s yard playing and chasing her “critters” outside. He was enjoying time with his grandfather. It was the typical picture of what things were like when we went “home” to see our family.
I was soooo excited, in spite of my concern for my father-in-law. I had just received a nice package filled with beautiful slick copies of the magazine which was featuring one of my articles for the first time in a magazine. In spite of the difficult circumstances, I was elated to get to give Mamaw her own copy of my first article in a magazine. It was my treat to give her that day. I was hoping it would brighten her day. I had NO idea that it would lead to a pivotal moment in my life.
She was in awe! She stood there with big alligator tears in her eyes as she beheld the magazine. Seeing my name there on the glossy page was a total delight to her. Just months before we had stood in that kitchen having a very interesting conversation that was the “back story” for what was going on that day. Actually, so many of those special days in that kitchen were the catalysts behind that very special day.
I remember time-after-time sitting there or helping her with her chores while she just poured forth into my life. She would talk about little things like tips for sewing or cooking or homemaking. She would talk about even more challenging things like disciplining the children and being a godly wife. She would also talk about life-changing things like my relationship with God and how to live an authentic and intentional Christian life. While the conversations were never planned, they were milestones in my life–big and small. I don’t know how many of you just crave for a Titus Two mentor, but as a young woman I just wished that God would send someone to be a Titus Two mentor into my life. Little did I know that it was through those God put in my life to influence me. There could never be anyone who could teach me to love my husband and children like their very own grandmother. No one else could teach me to love my home and the ministry within my home like the grandmother who’s home called us “home” from so many miles away. Her influence was perfect training. Isn’t that how God does it?
I loved time with her. Every time I was around Mamaw, I came away with so much wisdom. Many times, I took a notebook and jotted down tips and ideas while we talked. They were GOODIES! GEMS!
It was not long until I became the secretary for our local smocking guild (heirloom sewing group). I was responsible for producing the newsletter for our members. For those who know me, you would not be surprised that I simply COULD NOT stand to have the page only include the details for the meeting. There was SO MUCH WHITE SPACE! I thought that sewing tips were an adorable embellishment for our newsletter. I loved tips so much that I thought it would be fun to include them each month in my newsletter. They made it all fun. Of course, most of my tips came from learning at Mamaw’s side. I got so many great ideas from her that I decided to pay for her membership to the guild so she could get the newsletter. She LOVED it! Actually, she loved it so much she passed it around to all of her friends.
I had no idea until one day I went to see her and she asked me to go by the local paper to ask our editor to put the tips in the paper. My response was probably the very same response you might would have, “Mamaw, BUT I AM NOT A WRITER.” She gave me a quick list of reasons why the newspaper “needed” my tips. All I can say is that I knew not to mess with her! ha! I went to the paper to just ask. I was completely convinced that they would laugh me out the door and that THEY would silence Mamaw’s crazy idea once and for all. Well, it didn’t go that way. Mamaw was right. They not only wanted my tips, but they wanted for me to begin my own column. Every week after that I had a column. I always tell everyone that I fell into it backwards. I think Mamaw shoved me! ha! Either way, God used her belief in me to give that nudge in a direction that would have NEVER been one I would have even thought to pursue.
Now, fast forward with me. I had moved away. My column had grown. I loved it. But, I still did not have a vision for what God was about to do. In fact, I had no idea what God wanted for me to do with my life. I knew He wanted for me to be a godly wife and mother. But, I wondered what He had meant by calling me into ministry. He had been so specific at several times of my life. I could not put the pieces together. I had kept right on moving forward, being faithful in all that I KNEW I was to be doing each and every day. But, I just could not see how all of the pieces came together. It was really unsettling. Well, that is where this story gets good! I have told you already about my first magazine article and how I was about to surprise Mamaw with her own copy of it. But there was more to the back story.
One of the reasons Mamaw had wanted the tips put in the paper was that she was keeping a notebook filled with my goodies and did not want to miss even one. Her notebook was filled with all of those articles, my recipes that I would copy and share with her, all of my letters sent from Alabama, all of the cards I sent her, pictures of our family, etc. It was her “Cindy” notebook. Now, I do want for you to know that I was married to her grandson. I was an “inlaw.” He was not even her only grandchild. She had a beautiful family filled with grandchildren and great-grandchildren. But, she valued my writing and I was just a Dental Hygienist–NOT A WRITER!! She valued my writing so much that she KEPT it all. What is even more touching was that she had set up a PLACE to keep everything. That takes great effort. She not only kept it, but she invested in a nice, big notebook and sheet protectors to guard every piece like it was a great treasure. She kept things that would have been long forgotten, long lost. But, she kept them because they were dear to her. They were dear to her because I was dear to her. Do you think she ever knew how that one commitment would change my life?
Well, now let’s go on to that precious day. I had been writing my heart out for my sweet little column. I fell in love with writing. It was like having a nice afternoon tea with friends. I could pull back as my little ones played or slept in and pour myself a cup of tea and just share my heart. Sometimes it was tips. Other times it was my excitement for being a wife and mother. Every article was a piece of my heart. I simply loved writing! It became my favorite hobby. Who would have figured it? Mamaw???
That day was very special. As we look back, it was the last day I would see her and spend time with her. Only one short week later, she passed away. Her death was a sweet, yet very difficult time for us. Never before had I seen a true Proverbs 31 woman pass away. Yet, in her death every word spoken about her was declaring Proverbs 31 over and over. She was the one! Well, one of that beautiful crowd!
To me, looking back, I know that day was a gift from God. It was to go down in my story as a pivotal moment. I have never been the same since.
Remember I mentioned going through those years enjoying my calling as a wife and mother, yet having a void there in my life. I was a Christian. I was a committed Christian. I loved womanhood. But, there was a void. It just was not coming together. I wondered many times if I had somehow missed my calling along the way. Very often, I would get a bit frustrated that I did not use my single years to pursue ministry and missions. I could not figure out how I would use my gifts and talents to pursue my purpose. I was just confused.
That last day with Mamaw was precious. I was so excited to give her that beautiful copy of my article in a REAL magazine. I knew it would be a delight to her. But, I had no idea exactly how much of a delight. I don’t know, maybe things don’t always “click” with me. I had heard her talk about her “Cindy” notebook. I had even started writing for the newspaper because she wanted to be sure that no one kept HER COPY of my articles. But, until I gave her that gorgeous magazine, I had not SEEN the “Cindy” notebook. WOW! She pulled it out. It was a treasure to her. I could tell. I stood there with big tears in my eyes. Her commitment to protect my work as a treasure to her was overwhelming. She really LOVED my writing. She really TREASURED my writing. It was more than important. It was a treasure! You don’t just “keep” things like this. It was intentional. It was a priority. It spoke volumes to me.
No one, not even myself, had kept EVERYTHING with such a passionate love for me. Sure, my mom kept so many things. But, I don’t think she had even kept those articles. In fact, *I* had not even kept them all! UGH! Mamaw did not miss even one of them. They were all there. Kept for future generations. Precious. Guarded. An investment into ME and those who will come after me.
I stood there looking at the notebook. I was overwhelmed by the thoughtfulness, but there was more. You could see it in Mamaw’s eyes. She truly LOVED and ADORED my writing. It meant so much to her. I had never thought about my words being valuable, much less loved or needed. They never seemed to be too great in school. Well, in school, actually I always felt that my words and my ideas did not measure up. They never seemed good enough. My teachers never really gave me outright encouragement in those areas. Sure, they made me editor of the school paper. Of course, I thought that was to torment me! (ha!) They were very hard on my writing. I could not understand it. The last thing I wanted when I came out of school was to write anything for the rest of my life. Funny how God changes things, huh?
There was something that was rising up in my heart as I stood there looking at that notebook and Mamaw’s excitement over the magazine. I could feel all of the pieces in my life coming together as I stood in that room with her. It was more than pivotal. It was life-changing.
She took a few moments to read the article. She was “buzzing” as she did. She LOVED it! I felt a pride inside that was just precious! I respected her sooo much that I wanted to please her. This was a beautiful gift for her that day.
As she finished reading the article, she said something that would point the way for the next thing AND would change my life entirely. She, very matter of factly, said, “Cindy! You HAVE GOT TO write a book!” My immediate response was almost exactly the same as my response in that room to her challenge to write for the newspaper, “Mamaw, BUT I AM NOT A WRITER.” Can you imagine her sweet face in heaven as she looks down upon me today after I have written almost 150 books, thousands of articles, and taught thousands of workshops in the last 25 years? Just funny!
The most precious part of that afternoon in that sweet Southern kitchen was what followed. She told me that I could easily take my articles and put them together into a book. She was not a writer. How did she have SUCH vision? She continued to talk to me about sticking to my priorities. She told me that I was a good wife and mom. She told me how proud she was of our family life and our family. She shared with me her one prayer request that God had answered for her–that all of her children and grandchildren and great grandchildren would be saved and serve God all of their lives (all of us were saved and serving God in ministry!). She literally passed the torch to me that day. It was a spiritual mantle that she placed upon me in that sweet Southern kitchen. I wear it today. It is my passion. It is the call. It is my life purpose–to help those in our culture get back to God’s design for true, authentic godliness and the godly home. The pieces all came together that day.
We had our biggest dinner ever that day with Mamaw. It was her last one to cook. But, I was full before the blessing was ever asked and one bite was taken. She had poured forth more that day through her spirit than she had cooked up in that kitchen in all of the years of her marriage!
She believed in me. She had faith that I would pick up the torch and carry on the legacy for generations yet to come. She saw something in me that I did not even see in myself. She delighted in something in me that I did not even know was there.
I wonder today who WE could touch like this? Is there someone we could just believe in? Is there someone we could just enjoy and delight in? Is there someone who’s life just might be different if we would invest in them? I am talking about the little things and the big things. I am talking about the moments we least expect. I am talking about being ALL THERE even in the kitchen LIKE we would be in a pulpit! That is where the legacy is built. That is where the legacy is passed on to future generations. And, it might only take a notebook!
About Cindy Rushton…
Cindy Rushton is the mother of Matthew (28) and Elisabeth (25). She is Mimi to Joshua, Achilles, and Oliver. Cindy lives in Middle Tennessee. Cindy is the author of almost 150 books, Bible studies and homeschool resources. She has become a beloved and favored speaker for churches, special events, conferences, homeschool conventions and retreats across our country. You may contact her through email: cindyrushton@gmail.com. See her online at:
See Us Online!
http://www.CindyRushton.com
http://www.CindysDesktop.com
http://www.MomtoMomRadioShow.com
How are you doing in your marriage? I remember when we began homeschooling. For the first time in my life, I had finally found the fulfillment that God had planned for me from the foundations of the earth. The only problem was that I found myself either entirely too child-centered, talking about the children and homeschooling with every breath OR simply too exhausted from the pull on my time and energy as I balanced homeschooling, homemaking, and motherhood! I found myself in awe of this good-looking man I had forgotten along the way. How are your home-fires? Are you finding that good-looking love-bug to be a stranger and you don’t know where to begin romancing him? Want some fun ideas??? Here are 101+ ideas that are SURE to make your (AND HIS) heart patter with that same passion from your honeymoon days! Have fun!
Plan a daily Pow-wow time! Whether it is coffee in the morning…coke over a mid-morning break…afternoon tea (coffee!)…or bedtime cuddles, set aside a time for the two of you to keep up with one another! Share your plans, dreams, vision, struggles, concerns, ideas. Get to REALLY know one another! Be sure that your children learn to respect this time. They will LOVE to watch their Mommy and Daddy as they deepen the romantic love for one another!
Make him a “CD” of “your” love songs from your dating years! (more…)
“Every wise woman buildeth her house: but the foolish plucketh it down with her hands.” Proverbs 14:1
Building your marriage? Is it on the back-burner? Busy with the children and the house and homeschooling and working in your business? Just dropping at the end of the day with nothing left over?
I am not trying to give you another thing to do with your busy day. Rather, we need to get back to God’s design for the godly home. Take a peek at this passage from 1 Corinthians 11: 7-9
“The woman is the glory of the man. For the man is not of the woman; but the woman of the man. Neither was the man created for the woman; but the woman for the man.” 1 Corinthians 11: 7-9
Our number one priority after our relationship with God is our marriage. We are created to be a helpmeet. Not a small thing! Not an extra thing. It is absolutely essential.
I have gone through entire years of focusing on different roles that I must fulfill to the detriment of my main calling—to be a wife.
I remember the first year of homeschooling my children. As the last days of the school-year rolled around I realized that in my enthusiasm of turning my heart back home toward my children and really enjoying motherhood to the fullest, I had not nurtured my marriage as I should have! Days had gone by where both of us were so busy with our other roles that we had very little time, much less energy, to connect. The year just flew by with very little focus on building our marriage. Ever found yourself like this?
There are so many different facets of womanhood. We constantly juggle so many roles. It is so easy to get so wrapped up in one area that we lose sight of all of the others!
Our main calling, first and foremost, as women is to the awesome role as a helpmeet for our husbands. We are to bring glory to our husbands so they may in turn bring glory to God.
Isn’t this beautiful? We are those hidden women who reflect all of the glory back to our husbands…who build up our husbands and promote THEM…who do all that we do to help them subdue and have dominion over the world!
Where there is a beautiful marriage, all else falls into place. Two become one. There is security, stability, and a good model of biblical priorities in the lives of the children. There is a ministry to the world. This is the means that there is glory reflected from the family and the marriage. In turn, this glory magnifies God to our culture. Others see God’s perfect plan for man and woman! There is hope. There is abundant life.
The catch here is that beautiful marriages do not just happen. It takes work. Hard work. It takes commitment. Years of commitment. It takes priority. Intentional priorities.
Want a great marriage? Build your home! Build your marriage. Have no idea where to begin? Let me help. Have a good marriage? A good carpenter always looks for new tools. A good carpenter never thinks he is done. He keeps on building. Marriage is teh same way! Let me share a few tools that will make your good marriage even better–or, prayerfully the very best. Ready? Dig in with me…
–> Always build! We don’t have an option. We must intentionally build our marriages or they will fall apart around us. We must be intentional about what we do. Our marriages need to be on our calendar. Our marriages need to be on our daily to-do list. Don’t shove them to the back of everything. The benefits flow to everything and everyone else. So, build your marriage.
–> Don’t hold anything back! Give your all–all your gifts, talents, bents, knowledge, understanding, and wisdom! Be a real helper to your husband! Give him assistance during the tough times. Protect his heart and his name. Step in the gap and pray hedges of protection around him in all that he sets forth to do. Adapt yourself and your whole life to him—to God’s plan for him. Wrap your life around his with the intention to make him great. To bless him. to bring him glory. After all, as you bring him glory, he reflects glory to Jesus, Who reflects glory to our Heavenly Father. It all beings with you. Don’t hold anything back. Pour it all out!
–> Be his best friend! Do the little things to build your friendship. Take time to just enjoy him. Take time to LISTEN. Take time to enjoy the things that he enjoys. Look for ways to pal around. Develop a close, intimate friendship with your very best friend!
–> When in doubt, die to your ways and your ideas and your plans! OUCH! Decide now that you will live your whole life as your husband’s chief support. Only when we die to SELF can we really have an abundant, lavish life. Be the one who gives him that respect that he needs. Be the one who knows all that he is and yet still admires him more than even his little 2-year-old boy! Be the one who loves him unconditionally, enough to give up all life could possibly offer you to build him up! Die to all you had in mind for your life and commit to promote him. Watch what God does when you take that first step!
–> Contribute to his growth, his enlargement, his excellence! Patiently nurture him and encourage him to develop interests (Bible Study, SWAT team, metal detecting, sailing, email–He needs down time too!) that will help him to re-fuel, re-charge, and become strong. Beautiful, forever marriages all have several key elements. One of the most important is embracing change and growth, encouraging each other to expand, keep learning, keep growing, and helping each other press on toward big dreams together. It knits you together in a forever love story!
–> Affirm your man and his manhood—get excited about his leadership, his masculinity, his sexuality, his work! Reassure any insecurities! Enjoy his masculinity. God created him to fill your gaps. ENJOY that rather than despising it. Yes, so often we get frustrated, exasperated, and despise the differences between man and woman. Such a contrast to God’s plan. God wants for us to enjoy our differences. He wants for us to affirm one another. Ask God to help you enjoy your husband and all of the blessings that he brings into your life. Why not begin a list of things that your husband does to provide, protect, and lead you? Keep that list going. When you find yourself struggling with the differences, take time to dwell on your list. It will change your perspective and help you to build your marriage.
–> Be the one person who always believes in him. Be the one person who always has total confidence in him. Inspire him to greatness! Encourage him dream big and go for his dreams. Have vision for all God wants to do in his life. Encourage him. Be his teammate as he works toward that calling. Relieve him where he needs relief—where can you come alongside to help him??
–> See a weakness? Of course, you will. That is part of becoming intimate and real with one another. The question is what do we do when we see a weakness? Do we point it out? Nag them about it? Ask our friends to PRAY for him? Worry? Fret? Fear the future? OR…Do we come alongside of them and offer them strength, back-up, support? Do we take it all to got in intercession with prayer and fasting? Do we jump in and give them inspiration and encourage them. How do we respond when we see their struggles? It makes a world of difference! One choice builds our homes. Another choice destroys our home. Cry out to God on their behalf. Find ways to make it easier for them, any way you can. Help them succeed! Love them in their weaknesses and struggles. Be joyful and positive, always uplifting and encouraging! Let God supply your needs, not your husband, things will relax…you may change your heart! At minimum, you will be building your home instead of tearing it down with your own hands.
Sweet friend, will you build? Will you build a godly, forever marriage?
Decide now to pour yourself into your husband! Build your marriage! Let the little things go so that you have time to get to know your husband, so you will have time to minister to him in little ways. Take that time for the relationship and you will find that all else will fall into place! Invest your best into your home. You are building a home, a marriage, a godly legacy!
Oh, wise woman, BUILD your home!
What do you want for this year? Think for a moment with me… Next year, this time, what do you want to see different in your life? What would you like to see finished? What would you like to see accomplished this year?
Dear friend, this year is the year of fullness. I have committed to make this year a year of commitment, accomplishment, and productivity. Want to make this year the very best ever too? Let’s find some keys to productivity. Let’s dig in and get moving strong. Ready? Well, today let’s look at one of my biggest keys to productivity…
Take time to write EVERYTHING down!
Talk about a key to productivity! If there were one thing that I really believe makes the difference in my own productivity, it is this one discipline. I know, I know what you may be thinking…
“But, Cindy, I write things down and that is as far as they go.”
or
“I write things down, but then I can’t find it again.”
or
“I get too overwhelmed when I see ALL that needs to be done.”
Oh! You are going to love this, beloved! Let me take you by the hand and show you how to make this work for you. It is soooo important. You see there are some secrets that productive people have. Want a few?
1. They have ONE PLACE to write things down. Now, this does not mean that it you will have only one place forever and ever. Let me give you an example from how this looks for me. I always have my “Little Black Book” in my purse. No, not for phone numbers of old beaus–I am married to the ULTIMATE beau! 🙂 Rather, I invest in one small notebook that is small enough to carry everywhere I go, yet big enough to hold my goals, lists of steps to reach those goals, brainstorms, etc. This is SO IMPORTANT! Invest in ONE notebook as YOUR “brain” for this year.
2. They take time to pull aside and “brain-dump.” Yes, you read correctly. Want a secret to productivity? This one will make sense as you pull it all together. Yes, dump your brain regularly. Actually, take some time to dump out everything in your brain now–all of those things that need to be done, all of those things you wish for, all of those things that you want to do, but cannot find time to do. Dump it all into your “little black book.” As little things come across your mind, dump them. That will be your “place” for every idea, hope, dream, goal, to-do, and wish to all be dumped off of your brain and “kept” for you. Wondering why this is a secret to productivity? Glad you asked! The leading hindrance for most people is the stress of having to remember or not forget details. This distracts. This takes the focus from what you need to be doing. Actually, this contributes to forgetting what needs to be done in the task you are doing at the moment, causing things to take longer than they should. Not to mention, we are much, much less likely to ever do things that float in our head as well-wishes. Instead, dump it all in a safe place–your very own “Little Black Book.”
3. They plan. They plan yearly, monthly, weekly, and daily. You probably know this. However, do you know how to make it work? This is an essential! Here is how I do it.
Every year, I plan a nice Mommy Getaway to really evaluate and plan out the next year. I cannot express how much of a difference this makes for me. I am not talking about putting every day on the calendar. I am talking about sketching out the events of the year and planning my projects for my home, business, family, and myself. I PENCIL in my yearly plans. I also spend time brain-dumping anything that may be floating in my brain. I love this time. It helps to give me a grasp on my year and get in gear.
Of course, this is not enough. Each month, I pull back for an afternoon or weekend to plan out my month. I go back to my yearly plan and pray over what REALLY needs to be on my calendar. Once the final projects and events are chosen, I brainstorm all that needs to be done (all of the things to do) for that project to be completed. Now, do note that because I have “my place” for brainstorming, my little black book, I can brainstorm as things come to mind all along the way. This makes that monthly planning very easy.
Another thing that helps me along the way are my checklists for common projects–like all of the things to do to finish a book or an audio set or prepare a seminar. I have done those things so many times that I have developed checklists so I remember each step that needs to be done to get everything ready. Same thing for my holiday meals or other home projects. Talk about a time saver. Well, wondering what you do with those? I take those and put them on my monthly calendar at a good pace to get things done incrementally.
Each week I make sure that everything is done for the week before and take a good look at what will be done the following week. If I need any supplies, I pick them up over the weekend so I am ready to go each day-nothing can mess up your schedule like missing what you really need to get things done.
Finally, every day, I plan the night before. I end each day going over my daily list of things to do. Any of the the tasks that did not get done for the day are moved to the following day’s list. I also plan in the next steps and make sure that everything is ready to go when I wake up. I get SO much more done when I have a clear picture of all that needs to be done before the day begins. Want a key to productivity? PLAN!
4. Work your plan! Finally, want to know the difference between writing things down, having the perfect plans, and getting things done? This is it! Productive people work their plans! This means that we don’t just write things down. But, we also have a plan for working the plan. This is the bottom line that determines whether we are productive or not. So, how on earth do you do this one? A few quick tips:
–> Keep your planner WITH YOU! Keep it out and keep it with you. I have a small daytimer that I can carry with me all of the time. All of my important information is WITH ME all the time.
–> Set up your planner to work with YOUR LIFE. My daily things to do probably look very, very different from yours. What I need in my binder is different today than last year. One key that really made a big difference for me was when I finally set up my binder with forms that *I* needed. In fact, that is the story behind our Make Your Own Brain-in-a-Binder that I developed for my own planner. I always buy a nice binder and throw out anything that does not work with my life. Then, I print out pages that help me to put all of the things I need in one place. I use my planner all day long every single day. It goes everywhere with me. The key was in setting up my planner to work with MY life and all of the things that I do each and every day.
–> USE IT! Nothing helps me more than having my binder out first thing in the morning over my Quiet Time (to pray over my day)…sitting out in the family room all day…going back over all of the things to do all throughout the day (after each task)…going back over my day as I wrap up the evening…AND most of all, planning the next day right before I go to bed so everything is ready to get going the next day. USE that planner. Watch to see the difference!
Yes! Write things down. Make that time. It will make a HUGE difference in your productivity. It will help you to get a plan for reaching for those dreams.
So, what do you think?
Ready to make this year the very best ever? Want to make this year the most productive year ever? Why not take time today to write everything down? Why not begin today to put those dreams on your to-do list, bit-by-bit, day-by-day?
Need help organizing?? Let us help! Grab Cindy’s Make Your Own Brain-in-a-Binder today. She will walk you step by step through the process toward getting organized! You will love it!
